


Do You Want to Play Pilot?

by BurnedStars777



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attraction, Awkward Romance, Babysitting, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Childhood Friends, Dream Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Family Drama, Flashbacks, Fluff and Smut, Kylo Ren and Rey Are Not Related, Masturbation, No Underage Sex, Old Friends, Poe Dameron/Finn Fluff, Rey Needs A Hug, Secret Relationship, Sexting, Sexual Tension, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-01-23 14:41:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 25,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18551836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurnedStars777/pseuds/BurnedStars777
Summary: “It’s mad that our two best friends are getting married to each other,” Rey said, grinning.“Yeah.” He stared at the drink in front of him.“Ben Solo, you would be much prettier if you smiled more.” And then she laughed, and he knew he was doomed.Poor Ben must navigate the murky territory of being hopelessly attracted to the girl he used to babysit.





	1. Chapter 1

            “Y’know Solo, I think this could actually be some good for you,” Poe was saying, as he clapped the younger man’s shoulder. “You’re tense enough as it is. This’ll help you lighten up.”

“I don’t like drinking,” Ben said sourly.

“I know, I know, but Takadona’s the only place that’ll host everyone that’s coming to the reception, and I wanted you to meet all of Finn’s friends.” Poe paused. “Who knows? You might even meet someone,” he added suggestively.

Ben grunted.

“Damn, you’re no fun. Maybe I should rescind that best man status…”

Ben gave Poe an unamused look. He knew his best friend was bluffing, but his tone was cutting enough for Ben to get the message.

He sighed. “I’ll try to…lighten up,” he said gloomily.

“That’s my man!” Poe pushed through the doors to Takodana. “I bet Leia will be eternally grateful to me for getting you out of the house.”

Ben rolled his eyes, trying not to think about that unfortunate fact.

He had moved back in with his parents after the…trouble he had gotten into last year. Well, he said _parents,_ but it was really only Leia. Han still never bothered to show his face, but Ben guessed some things would never change.

Ben squinted as his eyes adjusted to the lights in the bar. There was a massive dance floor with men and women of all shapes and sizes, most wearing very little clothing. He stumbled as some patron, who had clearly had too many, careened into him. Ben shoved the man off, lifting a fist, but Poe shot him a look.

“Any other night but tonight, Solo.”

“Fine,” Ben replied, lowering his hand.

Poe’s eyes scanned the bar, and then his grin widened as he found his fiancé. Sure enough, Finn was waving in their direction. He had too girls sitting on the stools beside him. One was a short, Asian woman with a pudgy face and a bright smile; the other was modestly dressed with straight brunette hair that fell to her shoulders. The latter stuck out in the bar, mostly because she looked dressed for the gym rather than a night out.

“Come on,” Poe said, nudging Ben’s shoulder and then moving to Finn and the others.

Finn stood up to greet them. “Thought you got lost,” he told Poe, giving him a quick kiss.

“Me? Lost? Never.” Poe’s eyes traveled to Finn’s torso. “I see my jacket’s fitting nicely.”

Finn grinned sheepishly. “I meant to return it when you stayed over last-”

Poe waved him off. “Keep it. It looks better on your anyway.”

Finn smiled and then turned to Ben, holding out his hand. “It’s good to meet you again, Ben. It’s…been a while.”

Ben suppressed his cringe as he shook the man’s hand. By Finn’s tone it seemed as though Poe had filled him in on the details. This night was going to be uncomfortable for him as it was without having to answer questions about his past.

“Congratulations,” Ben muttered awkwardly, nodding between Finn and Poe.

Finn just gave him an understanding smile, which made things even worse. Thankfully, he moved on quickly.

“Oh! This is Rose,” he said, swiveling to the Asian woman. “Rose, this is Ben.”

“Hi Ben, it’s great to meet you!” Rose said enthusiastically, giving him a big wave.

Ben blinked, not used to being around people so optimistic. “Nice to meet you.”

“And this is Rey,” Finn continued, gesturing to the other woman.

Ben turned to the second woman and frowned. Now that he really studied her, she looked oddly familiar, and he wouldn’t have thought anything of it if _she_ weren’t also watching him strangely.

“Ben?” she questioned. “ _Ben Solo?”_

Poe glanced between the two of them. “You two know each other?”

It took Ben approximately three seconds to remember her. His entire body stiffened and his eyes widened as he took in her appearance, at the way she had morphed over the years. Why, the last time he had seen her was…was _fourteen_ years ago, when she was seven years old.

“Rey?”

Rey grinned, adjusting her tan V-neck. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Okay, I’m lost,” Finn said, looking around wildly.

Rey smiled at her friend. “Ben used to be my babysitter, back when I lived with Plutt.”

Poe choked, and then burst out laughing. He clapped Ben on the back. “You didn’t tell me you used to be a babysitter!”

Ben’s ears reddened. “It was a stupid, teenage job Leia made me get. It was just for a year. It was nothing.”

He caught Rey frown at this, and he mentally kicked himself. He knew how hard life had been for her with her old foster father; the man had hardly been around, which meant Ben had been around a _lot._ And that certainly hadn’t been nothing to her.

“Was this before he moved you guys to Jakku?” Finn questioned Rey.

She nodded, bringing her hands up to put her hair in a bun. “It was a long time ago. It doesn’t matter. I’m back in Coruscant now.” She smiled. “Besides, tonight isn’t about me. It’s about you and Poe.”

“Damn straight,” Poe said jokingly, leaning over to give Rey a kiss on the cheek. “Can we get a round going here?”

As everyone took his or her seat at the bar, Ben paused before sliding into the stool next to Rey. When the bartender came by he ordered a water.

“Make it two,” Rey said, to his surprise. When he glanced at her, she kept her eyes on the table.

He swallowed. “I didn’t mean to…about before I…”

Rey did look at him then, and the corner of her mouth turned up in a smile. “It’s alright.” She thanked the bartender as he slid them their waters. She took a sip from her glass. “So…how are things?”

That was a complicated question. “Uh…you know. I’ve been doing a little bit of this and that.”

Alright, he had never said a phrase like that in his life. It sounded completely foreign coming from his mouth. His ears were bright red again, and he didn’t know why.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me.” She shrugged, probably sensing he wasn’t going to go into details. Ben watched as a strand of hair fell out of her bun.

“…How have you been?” he questioned, thinking it was the polite thing to do.

She perked up at that. “Good! I’m finishing up my degree in mechanical engineering and robotics. It’s been quite a bit of hard work but…it’s worth it.”

Ben nodded. “I remember you always wanted to build things.”

“And play pilot,” she added, smirking. “If I remember correctly, I had to _beg_ you to play with me.”

To Ben’s mortification, arousal pooled in his stomach at her phrasing. This was absurd. Back then there had been nothing remotely suggestive about their time together, _obviously,_ but watching her now, as a young woman it…unnerved him.

He cleared his throat. “Yes, well, I was seventeen. A little too old to be playing pretend.”

“You had fun, admit it,” she said, prodding him with her elbow.

His lips twitched.

“Rey! We’re going dancing!” Finn called to her, as he, Poe and Rose got up from their seats. “Wanna come?”

“Um,” Rey glanced at Ben. “That’s okay. I think Ben and I are going to stay and catch up.” She paused. “Unless you would like to dance.”

Ben looked so horrified at the prospect that Rey snorted.

“We’ll stay here,” Rey decided, and Finn nodded.

Poe shot Ben a curious look, which Ben most certainly resented. And then the trio disappeared into the mass of swaying bodies, and it was just he and Rey.

“I wish the music wasn’t so loud,” Rey admitted. “I’d like to talk to you more about what you’ve been up to.”

Ben raised an eyebrow. Perhaps she hadn’t heard? Or maybe Finn hadn’t bothered to tell her? Then again, why would he? He had only just found out their connection.

“This isn’t your scene,” he guessed.

Rey shook her head, smiling sheepishly. She gestured down to her attire. “What do _you_ think?”

“It’s an adequate shirt.” Then he took a large gulp of his drink because good God, _why_ was he so fucking awkward?

“Thanks,” Rey replied, shaking her head. “You really haven’t changed have you?”

“No.”

“I can see that.”

“You’ve changed though.”

She raised an eyebrow, and his tongue felt big in his mouth. “Well, I should hope so.” She glanced at the dance floor, oblivious to how his eyes fell to the curve of her neck as she shifted. “It’s mad that our two best friends are getting married to each other,” Rey said, grinning.

“Yeah.” He stared at the drink in front of him.

She looked at him then. _Really_ looked at him.

“Ben Solo, you would be much prettier if you smiled more.” And then she laughed, and he knew he was doomed.

Ben watched as she stuck her hand in her pocket to retrieve her phone.

“Do you…is it alright if I get your number?”

Ben blinked. “Uh, sure.” He took her device from her.

“Great,” Rey said, waiting for him to type his number in before tucking her phone away. “So, I suppose we’ll be seeing more of each other soon.”

Ben nodded. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Rey finished her water, and then leaned against the counter. “Well, I’m absolutely sloshed,” she joked, and Ben snorted.

“Do you need a ride home?”

Rey raised an eyebrow. “Um, sure.” She smiled. “That would be great actually.”

Ben had meant it had a joke, but clearly he needed to work on his delivery. Then again, the prospect of being in a car alone with Rey was now too tempting to pass up, as rattling as the reality was.

They ended up talking most of the night, while the music blared and the lights flashed around them. When they got up to tell Finn and Poe they were leaving, Ben let Rey do most of the talking, knowing he wouldn’t be able to look Poe in the eye if he told him _he_ was the one giving Rey a ride. His friend still gave him some side-eye as they turned to go, however, and it was all Ben could do not to sink into the floor.

When they exited Takodana, Rey rubbed her hands over her upper arms, and Ben wondered if he should offer his jacket. He was so absorbed in his mental debate that they actually passed his car and had to back track.

“It’s a good thing you didn’t drink if you drove here,” Rey commented, as she slid into the passenger seat.

“I don’t like drinking,” he said. “I don’t like its effect on me.”

Rey nodded. “I remember that,” she said quietly.

Ben’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, recalling an unfortunate memory of a situation Rey had witnessed years ago. He cleared his throat, burying his thoughts. “Where to?”

She told him her address, and he was stunned at how near she was to his own condo...well, Leia’s condo. Rey’s place was really only a twenty-minute walk away.

“I didn’t know you lived so close,” he voiced his thoughts as he drove.

“It’s really the cheapest one-person apartment I could find,” she admitted. “I’m still in school, after all.”

“You must work a lot,” Ben inferred. “To pay rent.” He cringed, realizing the statement was rude.

She didn’t seem to mind though. “I do,” she told him honestly. “This was actually my first night out in three months.” She smiled. “It’s worth it though, to see Finn so happy.” She looked out her window. “Did Poe ever tell you how they met?”

“Something about flight school.”

Rey gave him an amused look. “Finn is Poe’s apprentice. I think one day he wants to be Poe’s co-pilot.” She shook her head. “I don’t think I could work with the person I married. Or even with a boyfriend.”

“Do you have one?” Ben asked, surprised at his boldness.

Rey shook her head again. “I told you, all I do is work. When would I have the time?”

“Good point.”

They were silent for a couple of minutes, and then-

“How are Leia and Han?”

Ben visibly tensed, and Rey grimaced.

“Sorry, I know it’s none of my business.”

“No, it’s okay,” Ben said, and then he added softly, “I know you know.”

He stopped the car in front of her apartment. Rey glanced out the window and back at him. “Thank you. For the ride.”

Ben cleared his throat. “Sure.”

Rey bent down to grab her pocketbook, and her shirt shifted to expose a bit of cleavage. He immediately looked away.

“Um…I don’t know if you would…maybe want to get together sometime? To properly catch up, I mean.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Uh…okay. I mean, yeah.”

Her eyes twinkled. “Brilliant.”

There was an awkward moment where Ben wasn’t sure if he should give her a hug or sink into his seat, but finally Rey just nodded.

“I’ll text you,” she said, opening the door.

He nodded dumbly. “Sure.”

And then she was gone.

When Ben drove home that night, his mind was a mess. It was so peculiar to see the girl he had babysitted for a whole _year,_ and then see her now as a…well…with the way she looked now and-

“Fuck,” he muttered, pulling outside Leia’s condo. He knew his mother would already be asleep, so he moved quietly as he walked inside. He may not be on excellent terms with her, but he wasn’t a _complete_ asshole.

His phone vibrated as he stepped in his room. He pulled it out, assuming it was Poe, but instead it was from a random number.

_Oi, this is Rey._

Something shifted in his chest.

**_This is Ben._ **

_Yeah, I know. You gave me your number._

**_Right._ **

_Anyway, would you want to get tea sometime? Or coffee, if you don’t like tea?_

**_Yeah._ **

**_It’s up to you._ **

She took a few minutes to respond this time, and Ben hated the fact he was anxiously awaiting her next text.

_I can send you some details tomorrow. I know this great place._

**_Great,_** he responded lamely.

_See you soon,_ she replied and then, _I’m really looking forward to talking to you again._

Ben swallowed heavily, closing his eyes and remembering the way her slender neck had curved under the lights of the bar.

He paused before he eventually typed back, **_Me too._**


	2. Chapter 2

_“Are you Ben?”_

_Ben glanced down at the child in front of him. Her hair was pinned into three buns on the back of her head, her face splotched with dirt. One of her baby teeth was missing, and she was dressed in literal rags._

_He blinked at the state of the girl. “Uh, yeah.”_

_She nodded. “Plutt said you would be here. I’m Rey.”_

_Ben gazed blankly at her. “You call your father by his last name?”_

_This girl,_ Rey _apparently, twisted her face in disgust. “Plutt isn’t my father.”_

_“Oh.”_

_Rey plucked a doll from her nightstand. It was nothing more than a small bundle of cloth rapped together with colored fabric._

_“Do you want to play pilot?” she asked, her eyes shining bright._

_Ben curled his lip. “No.”_

_He already heard enough about flying to last a lifetime. All his father ever talked about in the rare instances he was home was how great a pilot Poe was. Ben was a disappointment in comparison._

_Rey narrowed her eyes. “Why not?”_

_“I don’t want to.”_

_“What_ do _you want to do then?”_

_Ben sat down across from her. “Look, kid, I’m getting paid to watch you, not to entertain you. So do what you have to do, but I’m not moving.”_

_Rey crossed your arms. “How old are you?”_

_Ben blinked, temporarily thrown off by the question. “Seventeen.”_

_“Huh.”_

_“Why?” Ben inquired, despite himself._

_Rey shrugged. “I dunno. You just seem like you’ve five.”_

_Ben did his best not to get offended by the comments of a child._

_“What do you like to do for fun?” Rey continued, wringing her doll between her hands._

_Ben wondered if he should even answer such a question, but he sighed; what was the harm?_

_“I like to write,” he admitted. “And draw.”_

_Rey stared at him for a long time, until Ben’s ears became red. He was unnerved by her intense expression. She crossed the room then, rifling through her shoddy desk area and withdrawing paper and a box of dull colored pencils._

_“Here,” she said, handing him the paper and the box._

_He stared down at the supplies. “What am I supposed to do with this?”_

_Rey crossed her arms. “Draw something.”_    

 

\---

There were two minutes where Ben Solo felt like a complete, and utter idiot.

He waited in the café, the exact address Rey had given him. He had shaved, which was stupid because he didn’t need to shave, but he did anyway. He wore a tight fitting T-shirt, some tan pants and dammit, he had even used a pinch of hair gel.

And he was losing it because she had yet to show up.

He thought about texting her, but really only seven minutes had gone by, and he was overreacting. He swallowed uncomfortably, his fingers curling into fists. This was why he didn’t do this. Go out. With people. In public. It always led to disappointment.

Just as he was debating whether or not to leave and never think about this again, the café door burst open and Rey sprinted inside, nearly knocking over a worker mopping the floors. She muttered an apology and then her eyes met his and she grimaced.

“I’m really sorry,” she said, sitting down across from him.

Ben stared at her. She was wearing capris leggings and a plain, tan V-neck-he was beginning to think this was a signature style of hers. Her jawline had smudges of oil and her cheeks were a rosy pink, perhaps a result from her sprint. The thing that intrigued him the most though was that today her hair was in her signature three buns, the same ridiculous style she had worn when she was younger. It brought back a surge of emotion Ben wasn’t expecting.

Rey tugged at the front of her shirt, fanning her sweaty body. Ben noted she had small pit stains.

“I’m sorry,” she said again. “I was working on a project and I guess I just…I got carried away.” She shrugged.

“It’s alright,” Ben said, his voice sounding strange to his own ears.

“I can get us something to drink,” Rey added, standing up. “What do you want?”

“Coffee is fine,” he replied, silently cursing for not being the one to offer.

“You like it black, right?”

“Uh…yeah.”

She nodded. “Okay.”

She walked to the counter to place their order, and Ben did everything he could not to look at her backside, not to notice how it jiggled slightly with every bounding step she took.

He squeezed his knuckles so tight he was surprised they didn’t pop.

“Here you go,” she said a few minutes later, placing his drink before him and retaking her seat. “So,” she continued, taking a tentative sip of her own beverage, “do you still like to draw?”

Ben stilled. “I’m…surprised you remember that.”

Rey gave him a strange look. “Of course I remember that. I remember everything about you.”

Ben’s mouth was suddenly very dry, so he took another drink from his coffee. When he put down his cup, he realized she was expecting an answer. “Sometimes.”

Rey nodded. “What do you draw?”

“A variety of things.”

When he didn’t elaborate, Rey’s mouth went to the side, and her eyebrows furrowed.

“You seem like you don’t want to be here.” She stared down at her cup. “If you didn’t want to come you didn’t have to say yes.”

Ben began to panic. “No, I wanted to! Wanted to come that is. With you. I wanted to come together, I mean,” please someone shoot him now, “I wanted to come here with you.”

Now he was the one sweating.

Rey’s mouth stretched into the type of smile that made it seem like she was holding in her laughter.

“I wanted to come here with you too,” she said, and then she moved to tuck a stand of hair behind her ear.

Ben was mesmerized.

She took another sip of her drink, and a droplet of liquid stuck to her top lip. Her tongue came out to trace along the edge, securing the drop and tucking it back into her mouth.

His cock twitched.

He cleared his throat violently. “So, do you have a part in this wedding, or something?”

Rey nodded. “I’m Finn’s best woman.”

The corner of Ben’s mouth rose. “I’m Poe’s best man.”

She gave him a sly smile. “Well, then it looks like we’ll be spending more time together than I thought.”

_Oh fuck, yes._

“Ben,” she said, suddenly seeming unsure. “I wanted to apologize for the other night.”

“Why?” he asked, genuinely confused.

Rey looked off to the side. “It really wasn’t any of my business, asking about…Leia and Han. I know you don’t like to talk about personal things, and,” she blushed, the color looking so nice on her, “and I’m probably making it so much worse by bringing it up now-”

“It’s okay,” Ben told her. “It’s…nice for someone to ask.” He was surprised at the omission, especially because it wasn’t untrue. “I live with Leia now, actually.”

He could have kicked himself. What thirty-one year old man admitted to living with his mother?

“Temporarily,” he added quickly.

Rey didn’t seem to judge him, however, as she took another gulp of tea.

“Oh, well if you ever need help looking for a place, I’m pretty familiar with the market.” Then she laughed. “What am I saying? You’re much older. Surely you know.”

He couldn’t tell if the phrase ‘much older’ was said with intrigue or disdain. It was so offhand that perhaps she was indifferent. He shook his head. This was getting ridiculous. This whole thing was ridiculous.

Even if they didn’t know each other, even if he hadn’t _babysitted_ her, she was the best friend of _his_ best friend’s fiancée. If he pulled anything both men were sure to be furious with him.

“Is everything okay?” Rey asked with concern, and Ben realized he was gripping the mug of his coffee a little too hard.

“Yeah,” he told her, and then shook his head to clear it. Just because he couldn’t pursue her didn’t mean he had to ruin the time they were having together. “So tell me about this project you’re working on,” he said instead, pleased with how casual and confident he sounded.

Rey’s eyes lit up.

 

\---

 

It was dark by the time they left the café. Once Ben had broken through his initial awkwardness, he found conversing with Rey came easily. She didn’t look at him the way so many other did, with suspicion or judgment. She even laughed a couple of times at his jokes, which was saying something because normally his delivery was so dry, no one could even tell he _was_ joking.

He walked her back to her apartment because it was the right thing to do, and also because it was on the way to Leia’s place. _His_ place.

“You can come inside if you want,” Rey offered, when she placed her foot on the first step. She paused. “I mean, it’s late so I understand if-”

“No, it’s fine,” he said, probably too eagerly.

He followed her up the steps to her door, watched her fumble with the keys before securing the right one. They entered her apartment and Ben glanced around, realizing very quickly that he could see why she had bragged of how inexpensive it was. For good reason.

“It isn’t much,” Rey said, perhaps understanding his silence. “I’m hoping once I graduate I can move to a place with more than one room.” She laughed. “Studio apartments aren’t really my style.”

“It’s…cozy,” Ben offered, and she elbowed him in the side as she passed by.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“Water is fine.”

Rey nodded, grabbing a glass and going over to the sink to fill it. She handed Ben his water and plopped down on her bed, gesturing for him to sit on the futon across from her. Ben sat, his spine pin straight as he watched her shift onto her stomach. Her shirt had ridden up, exposing her lightly tanned lower back.

“You know, after you drew for me that first day, I begged Plutt to sign me up for art classes,” Rey said offhandedly, kicking her legs back and forth.

“I didn’t know that.”

“Oh yeah, I was convinced I could be the next Picasso. I thought, well, if that grouchy boy could do it, so could I.”

“I wasn’t that grouchy,” he argued. Rey raised an eyebrow, and then he relented. “Fine.”

Rey placed her chin in her hand. “I thought about you every day for a very long time after we moved to Jakku. I always thought about how red your ears would get when I made fun of you…like that!” She pointed at his face and Ben scowled.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he insisted.

She rose then, crossing the room to lean over him. Ben’s spine hit the back of the futon, in an attempt to put some distance between the two of them. Rey either didn’t notice or didn’t care as she carefully reached out and lightly pinched the top of his ear between her thumb and forefinger.

“It’s warm,” she mused, feeling the blood pulse under his skin.

Her eyes were flecked with green and her breath smelled like the tea she had earlier.

God, he wanted to fuck her.

“I should go,” he said instead, rising so quickly that she almost tripped in surprise.

“Oh, okay.” She glanced at the clock. “It _is_ fairly late.”

Ben nodded dumbly. “Yeah, late.” He coughed. “I’ll see you some other time…for…”

“Wedding stuff?” Rey guessed.

“Yeah,” Ben said. “For wedding stuff.”

“Alright. Have a good night, Ben,” she gave him a small wave, sitting on the edge of her bed.

“Bye.” His face was flaming, and he scrambled out the door before he could make a bigger fool of himself.

 

\---

 

As soon as he got home he slipped into the shower, spitting into his hand and running over his cock, moaning quietly to himself.

He pictured her licking her top lip, her bit of cleavage peaking out of her tan V-neck. He imagined her in the shower with him, her hair soaking wet, her shirt still on but peeking up at the edges and clinging to her body.

He ran his hand up and down his cock eagerly, thinking of her tangling her long fingers in his hair, sucking on his lips. She was on her knees in front of him, taking him in her mouth, rolling her tongue over him just the way he liked it.

Then they were on her bed and she was crying out as he finger fucked her, her cunt wet and tight and smooth and slippery.

But it was the image of how he had seen her last, of her bending over him and lightly pinching his ear, her eyes raking over his face that finally made him come.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m going to be churning out a bunch of one and two shots like nobodies business, all Reylo, both modern au and canon compliant. They will all be fun, touching and steamy. I've got so many ideas! I'm just going to experiment and see how people respond and go from there. Keep your eyes out for some of these stories in the next several days!

 

          _“You have really big ears.”_

_Ben looked up from his book in annoyance. Rey sat across from in in the grass, leaning forward and studying him like some sort of exotic species._

_“Oh! They’re getting red!”_

_“Stop looking at them!” he snapped, burying his face in his book. This child was going to be the death of him._

_“Ben.”_

_He remained silent._

_“Ben!”_

_“What?” he sighed in exasperation, abandoning his reading._

_“Wait here.” She got up and sprinted back into the condo, returning a moment later with a piece of paper. She held it behind her back. “I drew you something,” she said, twisting back and forth._

_This time Ben was the one to study her. She was extremely restless, bobbing from one foot to the other, and her eyes were on his forehead. If he didn’t know any better, he would say she was nervous._

_“Here.” She shoved the paper so forcefully into his hand that it crumpled._

_Ben smoothed out the crinkles, looking at the colored pencil drawing. It was pretty clear that Rey wasn’t an artist, but it did look as though she had put a lot of time into it. The lines, although wavy and crooked, were drawn with careful consideration._

_It took him three seconds to realize she had drawn him._

_He wasn’t the focus of the piece, but he had certainly played a part. He was at the bottom of the page, his features exaggerated, his hair longer and messier than how it was in reality. The image of him waved up at the sky, and that’s when Ben noticed Rey had drawn herself as a pilot, flying in a tiny airplane, a big, red, crayon smile on her face._

_“Do you like it?” she asked, eagerly._

_Ben didn’t know what to say, mostly because no one had ever given him anything they had personally made. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “It’s nice.”_

_Perhaps if he were talking to an adult they would have been bothered by the lackluster adjective, but Rey was quite pleased. At least that’s what it seemed like, for she plopped back onto the grass and began making grass angels._

\---

 

Ben was jerked awake by a rapping on his door.

He blinked the sleep from his eyes and sat up sluggishly, giving his mother an annoyed look.

“Where were you last night?” Leia asked with a frown.

Ben gave her a blank stare. “I don’t think it really concerns you.”

Her lips thinned. “You could have at least call me, or sent me text message.”

“I’m _thirty-one_ years old.”

Leia sighed. “It has nothing to do with you age, Ben. It’s just for your safety.”

_You mean for other people’s safety._

“Well, I’m safe.” Ben lay back down and placed his pillow over his eyes.

He heard Leia sigh and then her footsteps faded, and after a moment he peeked out from under the pillow, just to make sure she was gone.

He didn’t understand her. All throughout his childhood she couldn’t have cared less if he had phoned in. She was always so busy with senate meetings and political events, that she barely knew where he was half the time anyway. It was only _now,_ after everything, that she was constantly on his back. Perhaps she thought it would make up for all the years she hadn’t bothered to place a vested interest in him.

Ben remembered as a child he would picture his face on milk cartons. He would wonder how long it would take for Leia to notice her own child was missing. Maybe she would search Coruscant, or even the entire planet from top to bottom. Maybe it would be enough for his father to come home.

He suddenly had a bitter taste in his mouth, and it had nothing to do with waking up. Deciding he couldn’t be in this place a moment longer, he surged from his bed and dressed quickly. He grabbed an apple from the countertop and walked out the door, making sure to slam it so Leia would know he had left.

He wandered aimlessly down the street, passing a few stores with help wanted signs. He knew he should apply to _something_ , if he ever wanted to get his own apartment. His eyes lingered on the sign of an arts-and-crafts shop, the type where every day people could just go in and paint whatever they wanted. They were hiring new managers.  

For a moment Ben thought he actually might step inside and request an application. It had been forever since he had drawn or painted or even written anything, and it could be nice to be around all of that again. Instead he continued walking. They would probably ask him to fill out a criminal history form, anyway.

As he strolled down the city streets, his hands in his pockets, a door to his right opened and he recognized a familiar face.

“Ben!” Rose exclaimed, her arms full of shopping bags. Her foot caught the door, and she craned her neck back inside. “Rey, come quick! Ben is here!”

The blood in Ben’s ears pounded fiercely, and it took all his willpower to keep his face neutral as Rey emerged, one small bag around her wrist. Her hair was tied up in those silly buns, and her blue V-neck was askew, exposing the strap of a sports bra.

She looked like she had just been fucked, and Ben could have punched himself in the dick for having that be the first thought in his mind.

“Hi,” Rey said, closing the shop door behind her.

“Hi.”

“What are you doing here?”

He shrugged. “Just going for a walk.” Well, if that didn’t sound like the lamest thing ever. “What about you?” he said after a moment.

“We were buying a dress for the bachelor party next week!” Rose swung her bags around enthusiastically.

“Some of us, got a little carried away,” Rey added, raising an eyebrow at her friend.

Rose smiled sheepishly. “You’re going to the party, right Ben? Oh, that’s a stupid question, of _course_ you’re going.”

Ben nodded. Poe had mentioned he and Finn didn’t want to split up their friends by gender, so they had decided to host a joint bachelor party with the closest people to them. He realized Poe probably would have even invited Leia if things weren’t so sour between her and Ben. He had been a family friend for years. Ben internally frowned, almost feeling guilty.

“It’s the navy blue boat in the harbor, right?” He didn’t know why he asked this, he already knew that, but he was running out of small talk.

“Yeah! I’m so excited!”

“I’ve never been on a boat,” Rey admitted, blushing when Ben raised an eyebrow. “I’ve spent most of my life in Jakku, mind you.”

“Right.”

Rose adjusted her grip on her bags. “We should get going. It was nice to see you again, Ben! See you in a few days!”

“Uh, sure.”

Rey tossed him a grin over her shoulder. “Enjoy your walk.”

Ben couldn’t have felt more like a loser in that moment.

 

\---

 

That evening he lay out his dress shirt and pants and ironed them to the best of his ability. He had never been good at this, but he made sure to go over every crease meticulously until it was as smooth as it was going to get. He hung the clothing items in his closet, and just as he was shutting the door, his phone buzzed.

Ben nearly dropped it when he saw Rey’s text.

_You should see me in this dress right now._

Just like that, every drop of saliva evaporated from his mouth. Was she flirting with him? Should he respond?

His thumbs hovered over the touch keyboard, not entirely having a plan when he noticed she was typing again.

_It’s barmy._

Oh. She hadn’t meant it in that way. Ben ignored his disappointment as he texted back.

**_I take it you still don’t like to dress up?_ **

_Nope. Especially in my line of work. Dresses are too restricting._

_And this one is unbearably tight._

Okay, she _had_ to know what she was doing.

_Have you found a dress yet?_

He smirked. **_I thought I could borrow one of Rose’s._**

_If you can manage to pry it out of her hands that is._ She began typing again.

_Do you remember when I had to get dressed up for that God awful piano concert, and I spilled fruit punch all over my white dress?_

Ben’s lips twitched from the memory. **_And then we dabbed even more fruit punch on it so it looked intentional._**

_I can’t believe you let me do that!_

**_You shouldn’t have been such a klutz._ **

_Fair enough._

Ben stared down at his phone as he sat on his bed. He wasn’t sure if he should attempt a new conversation, or if he should just call it a night. He didn’t want to be bothersome.

But he was also curious if she would like to see him again…outside of their wedding duties. So he grew a pair and just went for it.

**_We could get together again._ **

**_If you’d like._ **

**_Coffee or something._ **

He waited.

_Um._

_I’m actually really busy this week._

An overwhelming wave of regret was about to crash over Ben until she texted:

_But you should stop by my shop tomorrow. You can see the project I’m working on, maybe even help out._

His heartbeat picked up again. **_Sure._**

_Great. Night Ben._

**Night.**

He released a whoosh of breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. His head fell back against his pillow as he stared at the ceiling. Why was he putting all this pressure on himself? This was absurd. She was entirely too young for him. Maybe he was turning into one of those creeps that only went after younger women.

He eased his mind by telling himself Poe and Finn also had a sizeable age gap. But it felt different somehow. They hadn’t known each other as kids.

Ben closed his eyes, thinking about dresses and fruit punch.

 

\---

 

_“Do you have your license?” Rey asked one day, moving back and forth on the rickety swing in the backyard._

_Ben glanced up from his notebook, his pen cap gliding over his lips. “Yeah.”_

_“Did you drive here?”_

_“Uh, yeah. Did you not see the truck in the front?”_

_“_ That’s _your car?” she questioned incredulously._

_Ben huffed. “It’s a piece of shit, I know.”_

_Rey grinned at his foul language. “It’s shit!”_

_Ben glared. “Don’t tell Plutt I said that.”_

_Rey jumped from the swing, landing in a crouch. “You think I haven’t heard Plutt say stuff like that before? He says far worse.”_

_“Oh.” Ben supposed this made sense, from what little he knew about Plutt. The man wasn’t exactly refined._

_“Can we go for a drive?”_

_Rey’s eyes were so eager, that Ben found he couldn’t refuse._

_“Sure, kid.”_

_She climbed right into the passenger seat, and Ben clipped her in, the belt so large on her that it touched her chin. He walked to the other side and hopped into the driver’s seat, plugging his key into the ignition. The truck rattled to life, and then they were driving._

_Rey stared out the window, her dirty fingers touching the glass. Ben had half a mind to snap something at her, but he kept quiet. At least she was enjoying herself._

_“Do you not ride in cars or something?” he asked._

_Rey looked at him. “Plutt makes me walk everywhere.”_

_“Oh.”_

_“Can I steer?” She leaned over to touch the wheel._

_Ben swatted her hands away. “Don’t. I’m driving.”_

_“I want to try!” She unclipped her seatbelt._

_Ben slowed the truck to a stop, looking at her in irritation. “What are you doing?”_

_Rey didn’t answer him, but she climbed over and tumbled into his lap. She straightened and sat on his thighs, her hands gripping the bottom of the wheel._

_“What the fuck, kid?” Ben snapped, blinking wildly._

_“Drive,” she told him, and when he didn’t step on the gas she honked the horn._

_“Don’t do that,” he growled, but he began moving the car again._

_Her hands were much smaller than his. She gripped the wheel fiercely, her knuckles straining against the wood of it. Ben made sure to do the actual steering, but he could tell she believed to be doing most of the work._

_“I’m a great driver,” she told him matter of factly._

_“You’re alright,” he said dryly, but the corners of his mouth quirked up._

_“I’m going to be a pilot when I’m older.”_

_“That’s nice, kid.”_

_Watching her laugh and cut the wheel was the most fun he’d had all week._


	4. Chapter 4

            Ben knocked on the rusted door of the garage, peering around at the brick warehouse. He briefly wondered if he had come to the wrong place, when the door suddenly jerked up and there was Rey in a fucking tank top.

“Ben, great you made it!” She was sweaty and covered from head to toe in black oil. His eyes trailed down to her stained skin. She must have noticed his gaze for she chuckled. “I’m, uh, sort of in the middle of a something.”

Ben nodded dumbly, and then moved inside the garage when Rey stepped aside. She walked over to what he guessed was her project, a collection of gray, orange and white parts.

“You can shut the door,” she said, nodding over to him.

Ben turned around and reached for the garage’s handle, pulling down and sealing them inside. It was unbearable hot inside the small space, and he was glad he had worn a dark T-shirt to cover his sweat stains. He stared at the collection of parts.

“What is it?” he asked, coming to sit across from her, raising his knees. It almost looked like…a robot.

Rey wiped her forehead, only succeeding in smearing more grease across her face. “It’s going to be Poe and Finn’s wedding gift,” she explained. “Poe mentioned he needed an assistant to take care of menial tasks around the airport so I thought I’d design him a droid of sorts.” She pretended to place the white and orange covering over the parts to demonstrate how it would look when it was complete. “Ben, meet BB-8.”

Ben was extremely impressed. He had expected this project of hers to be fixing cars or whatever it was mechanical engineers did. Rey leant over the droid to fix a few wires, and then the orb rolled towards him. Ben twitched in surprise, getting to his knees and Rey laughed.

“He likes you,” she said, grinning widely.

Ben tentatively reached out and touched BB-8, and the droid rolled back as if he was also startled. Rey placed her hands on her hips, visibly proud of her invention. After a few moments she leaned over and switched him off, picking up a screwdriver.

“I’ll need a few more weeks, but he should be ready well before the wedding.”

Ben shook his head. “I always knew you were special, kid.”

It was the first time he had called her by the old nickname, and her grin widened. She was clearly flattered by his comment, and suddenly she wasn’t the only one feeling proud of herself.

“Can you hand me that wrench?” she asked, nodding beside him.

Ben gave her the tool, marveling how their fingers briefly touched in the transaction. Rey tucked some sweaty strands of loose hair back into her buns before scrutinizing the droid.

“So,” she said, making conversation as she worked, “I feel like whenever you see me I’m covered in sweat.”

Ben physically choked at that, but he turned it into a cough before she became any the wiser. “I hadn’t noticed,” he managed.

_Yes, you have._

“You don’t have to be polite,” she continued, making a few adjustments and then setting down her tool. She sat and crossed her legs. “Anyways, the next time you see me I’ll be unrecognizable.” Her lip curled in disdain.

Ben chuckled. “I think you’re over exaggerating.”

She shrugged. “Maybe. What about you? I know you’ve always hated these sorts of events.”

“I hated going to _political_ events,” he corrected. “There is nothing more tedious than interacting with pretentious government officials for hours on end.”

“I can imagine. You poor thing.” Rey placed her chin in her hand.

Ben snorted. It was silent for a few moments, and then he parted his lips, preparing to ask her something that had been on his mind for the past few days.

“Why aren’t you a pilot?”

Rey frowned. “What do you mean?”

Ben hesitated, rubbing his hand over his chin. “I mean, wasn’t that what you wanted to do? You talked about it practically every day. You always wanted to play pilot.”

Rey looked off to the side, and she just shrugged. “Things change I suppose.”

Ben studied her, realizing she probably had a couple secrets of her own. He could respect that.

“Well, what you have here is impressive,” he added, and her somber expression turned soft.

“Thank you.” Her mouth twisted to the side then as she studied his face. Then she got on her hands and knees and crawled towards him.

Ben fell back on his hands, startled, as she reached out to his face. “Wha-”

“Hold still,” she commanded using her thumb the brush to corner of his mouth.

The pad of her thumb was rough from work, but she touched his face with a gentleness Ben didn’t know she was capable of. It glided away from his mouth, pressing softly against his skin.

She lowered her hand. “You had oil on your face.”

Despite his shock, Ben scoffed. “Have you looked in the mirror?”

Rey laughed, the sound echoing around the garage. Her shoulders bobbed with the movement, and Ben’s eyes flickered down to her breasts despite himself.

God, she was covered in grease and sweat and she was beautiful.

 

\---

 

Ben sat on her futon, listening to the sounds of the shower in the bathroom. He was trying not to focus on the fact that he was literal feet away from Rey who was very much in a naked state; only the wooden door of her bathroom separated them. It was getting increasingly harder to ignore her though, especially when she began humming.

Thankfully he received a call from Poe in that moment, and he picked up, glad for the distraction.

“Solo, what’s up?”

Ben glanced at the bathroom door. “Uh, nothing.”

“Good, because I have some best man duties.”

Ben stiffened. “Now’s not really a good time.”

“What? You just said you weren’t doing anything.”

He sighed. Of course he had gotten himself into this situation. “What do you need?”

“I was just going to ask if you were around so I could get a second opinion on this suit. I don’t want to upstage my groom,” Poe said cheekily.

“It sounds like you do,” Ben responded dryly.

“Okay, maybe a little, but not _too_ badly. Anyway, I was going to have you over but I guess you’re…working? Is that what it is? Did you get a job?”

Ben sighed in irritation. “No. It’s not that.”

“Then what-”

The bathroom door opened, and Rey stuck her head out. Her hair clung to her neck, heavy droplets falling down her bare shoulders. A white towel was wrapped around her chest, but that was as far as he could see.

“Ben?” she said hesitantly.

Poe paused on the other side of the line. “Are you with a  _girl_?”

“I’ll call you back,” Ben said to his friend, and then he hung up. He placed the phone on her futon, noting how uncomfortable she seemed.

“What is it?”

She winced. “Sorry, could you…maybe close your eyes for a moment? I forgot to grab a few items.” Her face was bright red, and then all of a sudden so was his.

“Oh, yeah, sure.” He brought one large hand over his face, properly shielding his eyes, his shoulders impossibly stiff.

He heard her feet softly padding across the wooden floor and then the sound of her drawer being opened. What had she forgotten? A shirt? Panties?

He was starting to get hard, so he quickly thought about the most boring thing he could think of. Sand.

He repeated the word ‘sand’ a hundred times in his head, until Rey cleared her throat. “You can look now.”

Ben kept his eyes covered for an extra moment just to be safe. When he could see again he noticed she was back in her simple V-neck and crop leggings. Her skin was clean and rubbed raw in a few places from the shower. A few droplets clung to her neck, and one trailed down her skin, disappearing into her shirt.

Ben swallowed heavily.

Rey sat on her bed ungracefully, crossing her legs. “I just realized I don’t know what you do.”

All thoughts of his attraction were squandered with that one sentence, and now he just felt embarrassed.

“I’m…in between jobs right now,” he admitted. It wasn’t completely a lie.

“Oh, I see. What kind of job are you looking for, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Ben glanced at his hands. “I’m not really sure,” he said quietly, and he didn’t have to look in the mirror to know his ears were beyond red.

When he met her eyes again, he expected to see pity, but instead he found interest.

“That’s great,” she said.

He gave her a blank look. “What?”

She blushed. “I just meant it’s sometimes nice not having any idea. You could do anything. It’s freeing.” She shrugged. “That probably sounded bonkers.”

“No. I just…never thought about it that way,” he said honestly.

Rey looked relieved he had taken it well. “I’m sure whatever you end up doing you’ll be brilliant at it,” she continued, giving him a small smile. “I think you’re special too.”

If Ben were the type to whistle, he would have done so walking home that night.

 

\---

 

_He slammed his fist so forcefully into the side of his car he knew he had probably broken something._

_He had been having a decent enough day. He had had a meeting with his advisor about the option of college, and she had been impressed with his grades. She said he could probably get in anywhere he wanted._

_So that had been great. Really it had been. Ben wasn’t the academic type, but he prided himself on his intelligence, so it meant a lot._

_Then he had come home and Han had been there, and when he was in the room with his father it was only a matter of time before things exploded._

_“Come on, kid, with your brains, you could do_ anything, _and you’re thinking about art school?”_

_“I said I haven’t decided yet,” Ben snapped back, his temper spiking._

_“Well, I’m just saying your mother and I-”_

_“You don’t get to show up and order me around. You gave up that convenience a long time ago.”_

_It had only escalated from there. Leia had tried to break up the argument when Ben stepped forward, as if he were about to hit his father. Eventually he couldn’t stomach being in the room with either of them, so he left. He had to be at Rey’s in an hour to babysit, but he decided he would just show up early._

_He stepped inside her condo, realizing Plutt had already left. This just made him even angrier. That fucking deadbeat had left his seven-year-old alone for who knows how long-_

_“Ben?”_

_Rey stood in the doorway to the living room, her hair frizzy and her eyes wide as she took in his appearance. Her eyes went down to his hand, deformed and blistering, and then back to his red rimmed eyes._

_“Did you hurt your hand?”_

_Ben discovered to his horror that he was about to cry. He marched past Rey and sat on her couch, burying his face in his uninjured hand. His shoulders shuddered as he tried and failed to hold in a sob._

_Rey’s little feet retreated, and then she came back a moment later. He jolted upright when he felt her hand patting his upper back._

_“Here,” she said, and she handed him a single ice cube._

_Ben sorted, wiping at his nose before taking the ice cube and letting it melt on his busted hand. She didn’t ask him what was wrong, but she gave him a smile so tiny and so sad that he realized he would have told her everything if she_ had _asked._

_“Someday when I’m a pilot, I can fly you up in the air. We could go anywhere, if you wanted.”_

_Ben wiped at his eyes. “I’d like that, Rey.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: bachelor party ;)
> 
> Also, did you catch my sand reference?


	5. Chapter 5

_“Get that thing away from me,” Ben hissed._

_Rey frowned. “Why? It’s a real pilot’s helmet I swear! I found it!”_

_“I know, and that’s why I don’t want it touching me. Who knows where it’s been?”_

_Rey huffed, gripping the orange and red helmet to her chest. “Why won’t you play with me?”_

_“I’m too old for that stuff, kid.”_

_To his horror, Rey’s bottom lip trembled, and for a moment he thought she was about to cry. Instead, her eyes narrowed into a glare and she slammed the helmet on the ground so fiercely, he was surprised it didn’t crack. She sprinted up to her room, and Ben groaned in exasperation. Now he had done it._

_Rising from his seat Ben made his way to her room. He debated knocking on the door, but he wasn’t that polite, so he just pushed inside. Rey was on her bedroom floor, crouched and scribbling furiously on a piece of paper._

_“What are you doing?”_

_“You’re stupid!”_

_Ben gawked, taken aback by the blunt insult. “You’re stupid,” he fired back, and then shook his head. Had he really just stooped to her level?_

_Rey gave a small “hmph!” and then continued her scribbling._

_Ben sighed and sat down beside her, peeking over her tiny shoulder. “Why are you doing that?”_

_“I was going to give you this, but you don’t want it.”_

_Ben narrowed his eyes in confusion. “How do you know if you never asked me?”_

_Rey whipped around in outrage. “I always ask you to play pilot with me!”_

_Ben studied the ruined drawing further, and he realized she had probably drawn them as pilots together. Now it was almost entirely obscured with green crayon. He glanced around at some of her other drawings on the floor. Most of them were of planes, or of her wearing a helmet, or her flying._

_But there was this other one, partially hidden under the rest that caught his eye. He scooped up the paper, his eyes scanning every inch._

_She had drawn herself, and two people who he assumed were her parents. There were all these little objects around them, and at first Ben thought they were tiny planes. They he saw they were sharp and narrow at one end. They were needles._

_They were syringes._

_Suddenly Ben felt like a huge asshole. He stared at Rey as she miserably colored over her drawing, this time with a blue crayon. Then he leaned over and snatched the utensil from her hand._

_“Hey!”_

_“Get your helmet, we’re playing pilot.”_

\---

 

Ben straightened his collar aggressively as the wind blew it up for the fifth time. He had a feeling he was going to be doing this all night, given the bachelor party would be on the deck of a ship. His nose crinkled as he walked along the docks, the stench of sea curling into his nostrils.

He had always shown up to things alone, but over the past couple of months he had grown used to Poe accompanying him to places. Now as he drew closer to the ship and he could hear the sound of laughter and the tinkling of glasses, he felt very socially awkward.

He muttered half-hearted apologies as he pushed past a group of people he didn’t know; Poe had more friends than he could count, so it didn’t surprise him that he didn’t know most of the partygoers. The attendees themselves, he knew, were limited to his closest friends and his coworkers, so he assumed the bulk was part of the latter half.

“Ben,” Finn said, spotting him from across the deck. He muttered something to the woman in front of him, and then came over to his side, handing him a glass of champagne. “Glad you could make it!”

Ben didn’t have the heart to remind him he didn’t drink.

“Poe’s over there talking to some people we work with,” Finn explained, taking a sip of his drink. “Help yourself to any food or drink you can find.”

Ben nodded. “Thank you.”

There were a few beats of uncomfortable silence, and then Finn cleared his throat. “So, how’s the job search going?”

This was definitely the wrong thing to say, and Ben could tell Finn knew it.

“Ah,” he waved his hand. “Forget it.”

Ben’s eyes passed over Finn’s shoulder as something tan caught his eye. He knew at once it had to be Rey, for that was her signature color.

“Excuse me,” Ben muttered, moving to cross the deck.

She wore a short desert-sand colored dress that came off her arms in t-shirt sleeves. The fabric of the dress twisted into a knot at the front, and the length ended about mid-thigh. Her hair was down, the ends touching her shoulders. She even looked like she had put on eye shadow. She had just shoved an horduerve in her mouth, and her cheeks were filled like some woodland animal storing for winter.

In short, she was stunning.

Her eyes met his in that moment. She took a big swallow, and his heart skipped a beat as a huge smile stretched across her face.

“Ben,” she said, coming up to him, her flats squeaking against the wooden floor of the deck. She hesitated a moment before winding her arms around his shoulders and giving him a big hug.

He patted her back awkwardly, until she eventually let him go.

“I’m glad you’re here,” he said, and he could have jumped off the ship then and there. Why the fuck _wouldn’t_ she have been there?

Rey grinned, as if guessing his horror with himself. “The same goes for you. You look very handsome,” she added, nodding to his dress shirt and pants.

“Oh,” he said, looking down at himself. “Thanks. You look beautiful.” He met her eyes then, and he recalled a previous conversation. “The dress isn’t as awful as you said.”

“Actually, I said it was barmy, not awful, but thank you,” she replied, tugging at the bottom of it. She eyed his champagne flute. “I thought you didn’t drink?”

“I don’t. Finn handed this to me.” He paused. “Do you want it?”

Rey shrugged. “Alright. It’s a special occasion.” He gave her the flute, and she took a dainty sip. She reached for a small crab cake and held it out to him. “Horduerve?”

“Sure.”

He expected her to hand it to him, but instead she pressed the cake to his mouth, and the tips of her fingers brushed against his lips. Ben jolted slightly, but if Rey noticed, she didn’t comment. He took the cake in his mouth, positive some of his saliva had gotten on her fingers. She dropped her hand as he chewed and swallowed the cake, giving him a small smile.

This woman was going to be the death of him.

They moved around together, interacting with a variety of people. Ben let Rey do most of the talking, but he did manage to get into a semi-pleasant conversation with Rose. Apparently like Rey, she also liked to fix things.

“Let me know if you ever have any car issues,” Rose mentioned, beaming.

Ben nodded. “I will.”

He flinched as Poe grabbed his shoulders from behind, and Ben didn’t even have to turn around to know his friend was hammered.

“Glad you could make it, you asshole!” Poe cried, his face bright red. “You’re about to witness our main event.”

Ben noticed the ship’s crew was placing two chairs next to each other in the center of the deck.

Finn’s face paled. “Oh no Poe…you didn’t…”

“You bet I did!” Poe grabbed Finn’s hand and the pair sat in the two chairs, just as a line of very beefy men strutted onto the ship. At that moment, pump up music began playing and make-shift multicolored lights illuminated the wooden floor.

“Oh my god!” Rose screamed, laughing uncontrollably as some of the men began stripping in front of the couple.

Poe grinned insanely, and even Finn at this point appeared to be relatively amused. Ben turned to Rey and saw her eyes were wide in disbelief. She finished her champagne flute and put it on the table next to her.

“Well, that’s one thing I didn’t expect to see tonight,” she leaned over to tell Ben, just as all the men had removed their shirts.

Ben would rather not be privy to this sort of display, but as long as Poe was enjoying himself, he would just let it be. Suddenly he was very, very glad Leia was not at this event.

Some of the men began circling the ground, dancing suggestively close to some of the partygoers. Most people just laughed as the men grinded up against them, but some even joined in, doing well to keep their hands off the dancers though.

One of the men came over to their corner, and Rey’s face twisted in horror as he made prolonged eye contact with her. He began to shuffle in her direction when Ben took a step forward, placing a firm hand on her shoulder and sending a murderous glare the man’s way.

He got the message, for he sashayed away to claim another victim. Rey released a puff of breath.

“Thank you,” she murmured.

Ben nodded stiffly.

Then her arm brushed his.

He wasn’t sure if it was intentional, but she had definitely taking a step closer to him regardless. He looked at her curiously, but she kept her eyes straight ahead, occasionally shaking her head at the antics of Finn and Poe.

“They really are something,” she mused.

“Yeah.”

“I never thought I would want something like that but…” she frowned, “I think I do.”

“You want a half naked man to spank himself in your face?”

She elbowed him in the side. “You know what I mean, Ben Solo.”

“Yeah. I do.”

She glanced at him, and maybe it was the lighting, but her eyes looked soft. “I really did miss you, you know.”

Ben swallowed shakily. “I missed you too.”

She gazed back in the direction of the spectacle, but he kept his eyes on her, finding the way their arms brushed was the best sensation in the world.

 

\---

 

_Ben wasn’t sure what type of candy Rey liked, so he just got a little of everything._

_He parked his truck in front of her condo, and watched from his car as Plutt meandered to his own vehicle. He had a cigar tucked between his fat lips, and his white shirt looked yellow from lack of washing. The gluttonous man noticed his vehicle and he hobbled over. Ben rolled down the window._

_“Need you to take her to something soon,” Plutt grunted, blowing cigar smoke in his face._

_Ben’s nostrils flared. “What do you need?” he asked stoically._

_“It’s a school function. One out of a fucking million. I’m tired of going.”_

_Ben sincerely doubted Plutt had gone to a single one of Rey’s school events._

_“It’s in two weeks. I’ll pay you extra.”_

_“Okay.”_

_Plutt nodded and then moved to get into his own car. His lights flashed, and he veered off into the road, out of sight._

_“Rey?” Ben called as he entered her home, carrying the bags of candy._

_“Ben, come quick!” she called, and a jolt of panic swept through him._

_He dropped the candy and jogged down the hallway, coming inside her room. “What is…it…?”_

_She was in the middle of a handstand, her face bright red as she struggled to hold herself up. Finally, when her arms became jelly, she collapsed onto the ground, swiveling to face him._

_“Did you see?”_

_Ben grinned. “I saw.”_

_“Want me to show you again?”_

_“Maybe later. I brought you some candy.”_

_Rey’s eyes widened, and she nearly knocked him over as she ran past in the direction of the kitchen. Ben chuckled, and followed her, deciding he would ask her about this school event another time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: More bachelor party ;)


	6. Chapter 6

_“It’s the father-daughter dance,” Rey said simply, drawing in the dirt with a sharpened stick._

_Ben nearly choked on his black coffee. “_ That’s _what Plutt wants me to take you to?”_

_“Yup.”_

_He shook his head. “I can’t go to that.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“It’s…it’s just strange. I’m not a father.”_

_“And I’m not Plutt’s daughter. People can go with their brothers too. You won’t get looks.”_

_“Yeah, but-” Ben paused, eyeing Rey as she continued to idly draw in the sand. “Why would you even want to go? This doesn’t seem like something you would like.”_

_Rey just shrugged._

_“You’d have to wear a dress,” Ben pointed out._

_“I_ know,” _she said, her voice laced with irritation._

_“And you’d have to dance.”_

_“I_ know.” She pressed harder into the ground with her drawing utensil.

_“You’re telling me you’d want to wear a dress and dance?”_

_“That’s not what I’m saying!” Rey bent her stick so hard it snapped, and she tossed it away angrily. She swiveled around so her back was entirely to him._

_Now Ben was just confused. He put his coffee cup on the ground and crouched down beside Rey._

_“Hey, I didn’t mean to make you upset. I just don’t get why you would want to go to a stupid dance.”_

_“It doesn’t have to be stupid,” she mumbled, her face bright red._

_He raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? And what’s going to make it ‘not stupid,’ Rey?”_

_Rey stuck her thumb into the dirt, swirling it around and around. “If you’re there.”_

_\---_

Rey swore when she saw the line to the bathroom, and Ben watched as she swiveled to him with a look of panic.

“I don’t want to alarm you, but I may piss myself.”

“That’s a little dramatic, don’t you think?” Ben asked with a raised eyebrow.

Rey shuffled back and forth from one foot to the other. “I’m not going to make it. I think I have to go below deck.”   
“I don’t think guests are allowed down there…”

She grabbed him by the arm and began leading him to the steps. “Then if I’m caught, you can be my wingman.”

Ben opened his mouth to protest, but they were already halfway down the steps and her hand on his arm was warm. They emerged into a lavish hallway with small lanterns and a lush carpet stretching down the pathway.

Rey whistled. “I can’t even begin to imagine how much this costs.” She felt around various doorways in search of a restroom. Ben followed her, not knowing what else to do. “Ah,” she murmured, finding a sign marked ‘women’s.’ When she jiggled the knob, however, it was locked. “Bollocks.”

“See? We should just go back upstairs,” Ben insisted, casting a wary glance over his shoulder.

“And wait in that abysmal line? Not a chance.” Rey reached into her hair and pulled out a bobby pin. She smirked at Ben before bending over to pick the lock.

Ben watched in amazement as she worked the knob until there was a small click, and the door opened. Rey crossed into the restroom.

“I’ll be just a minute,” she promised, before shutting the door.

Ben waited patiently outside, constantly looking over his shoulders in case a crewmember walked by. He didn’t know why he was so nervous, but he just knew he really didn’t want to get caught.

He heard the distinct sound of the toilet flushing and then the faucet. Rushing water ran in the pipes above his head. Rey opened the door a few seconds later, shaking her hands to dry them.

“Ready?” Ben inquired, turning towards the staircase.

“Not quite,” Rey said, heading in the complete opposite direction.

Ben jogged to catch up to her. “Rey, what are you-”

“Exploring,” she said simply, poking around the hallways and scanning the doorways. Every once in a while she twisted a knob, but it was always locked. “I want to see how expensive these chambers are.”

“Worth more than I make,” Ben offered.

Rey paused, raising an eyebrow. “I thought you said you were unemployed.”

“My statement stands true.”

Rey gave him a dazzling grin before wandering further, and Ben felt obligated to follow. They did this for several minutes until they finally came to a dead end.

“Alright, you’ve finished exploring,” Ben said, sweeping his hair from his eyes. “Let’s go.”

“Look,” Rey said, as if he hadn’t spoken. She went over to the door on the end and pointed to the knob. “It’s crystal. It’s different from the others. “ Her thumb swept over the keyhole, and she dug the bobby pin into the slot.

“Rey,” Ben hissed.

“Oh hush, don’t tell me you’re eager to go back and converse with air traffic control workers?”

Fair enough.

With a few more turns, Rey twisted the knob and the door sprang open. Ben followed her inside, his eyes sweeping over the room.

It was small; the bed took up nearly most of the surface area, but he supposed most of the rooms were like this. It was a ship after all. There were a couple of nautical paintings with rope borders, and theme appropriate dressers and bed side tables. A full-length mirror stood at the opposite wall, and cloth lanterns protruded from the space above their heads.

“It’s nice,” Ben offered, glancing around.

Rey sat on the bed, fanning her arms out. She shook her head. “This is awful.”

“Huh?”

“It’s hard as a rock,” she explained, giving the bed a pat. “See for yourself.”

She tugged on his hand and he rotated to sit next to her. She was right.

He snorted. “I’m sure this would be an unpleasant surprise for vacationers everywhere.”

Rey chuckled. “And I think this is the honeymoon suite.”

They laughed softly, and then lapsed into a comfortable silence. Rey leaned over and flicked on some of the lights, so a warm, dim glow engulfed the room.

“I used to be afraid of the dark,” Rey admitted.

Ben blinked in surprise. “Really?”

Rey nodded. “I didn’t believe in monsters or anything silly like that, but I didn’t like not _seeing._ It unnerved me to no end.” She smiled. “I think I told you something like that once, long ago…and you told me to suck it up.”

“I don’t remember that,” he said honestly. “But it…does sound like something I would say.”

“I used to have a violent crush on you,” she said out of nowhere, and Ben jolted. “I thought you were so cool and intelligent.”

“You were seven,” Ben supplied, after he had regained the ability to speak. “Anyone older would have seemed cool.”

“Maybe,” Rey shrugged, “but I still think that.”

Ben scoffed.

“I’m serious,” she insisted.

“I’m out of work and living with my mother,” Ben replied, realizing he hadn’t referred to Leia as such in a very long time, at least not out loud. “Nothing about that is cool.”

“Then get a job and move out.”

He hesitated. “It’s…not that simple.”

“Why not? Any employer would be lucky to have you.” She folded her hands together, kicking off her shoes.

“I…” and suddenly he was at a loss for words. He didn’t want to tell Rey about what had happened a few years after she had moved to Jakku. He didn’t want to admit to the people he interacted with, did business with. He didn’t want to tell her the number of people he had hurt.

He didn’t want her to realize he was a monster.

“It’s alright,” Rey said softly, and he discovered he hadn’t spoken for well over a minute. “You can tell me when you’re ready.”

He swallowed. “And you. When you’re ready…you can tell me why you never became a pilot.”

In the dim lighting, he saw a small smile form. “Deal.” And then she lifted her hand and tugged on his ear.

Before she could retract her hand, his own came up to curl around her wrist. The smile on her face slowly faded as he brought it down to her lap. His thumb brushed over her pulse, and he could feel the beat of her blood. She turned her head, and the very tip of her nose brushed his cheek. In the low lighting, he hadn’t realized how close they were. She may have whispered something, but the throbbing in his ears drowned anything she might have said.

His lips brushed the corner of her mouth, and she inhaled sharply. His grip on her wrist loosened, in case she wanted to bring her arm up to push him away, as he half expected she would. Instead, she remained stone still, except for her other hand, which glided to his knee.

His lips flitted over her cheek next, and he saw her eyes flutter shut. He moved down to her jaw, feather light kisses, testing, but hesitant. He came to the corner of her mouth again, and this time the tip of his tongue traced her bottom lip. He shut his eyes as her lips parted underneath his, and he emitted a soft moan as she took his top lip in her mouth.

He kissed her properly this time, his skin on fire as her hand glided up his leg to grip his thigh. Her tongue tasted like the champagne she had had earlier. She angled her jaw, so he could move his head over hers, his hand coming to grip the comforter on her other side. Then he moved up her waist, and her hands were in his hair and he was incredibly hard. His tongue slid against her mouth slowly, dipping in and out, in and out. She made a soft noise in the back of her throat and his cock pulsed from the sound.

Rey gripped the front of his button down, and he gradually leaned far enough that she was on her back, her legs dangling off the end of the bed, her dress riding up her thigh. Ben carefully touched her knee, and he was surprised when she spread her legs a little wider. He wasn’t sure if it was intentional or not.

“Rey,” he murmured against her mouth. “I want-”

“It’s okay,” she breathed, and all the blood rushed from his head.

He sluggishly sat up, his finger brushing the skin of her inner thigh, right next to her knee. He carefully got off the bed, and she sat up on her elbows, watching him. He swallowed heavily, keeping her eye contact as he got on his knees. Her eyes were half-lidded and her cheeks were beyond rosy.

He placed each hand on her knee and gently pushed them apart before gliding up the outside of her thighs to push up her dress. She was wearing light gray panties underneath.

Ben kissed the inside of her knee, keeping his eyes on her as he cock throbbed against the seam of his dress pants. Her breathing hitched as he very deliberately kissed up her inner thigh, and the outside her panties.

Her head tilted back as he mouthed her through her underwear, creating a damp patch over where he knew her clit was.

_“Ben,”_ she breathed, and he lost the rest of his self-control.  

He slid her panties down over her thighs, over her knees, until they caught around her ankles. His tongue found her then, and she fully lay back onto the bed with a moan. He sucked on her clit, releasing it with a small ‘pop,’ just to do it all over again. He dipped his tongue in her entrance, briefly swirling it around and groaning when he could taste her.

He had never been this turned on in his life.

Her breathing became faster as he glided over her clit again, her ribcage rising as her pants became shallow. She had made a large puddle on the bedspread, and across his chin. He held her thighs down when they started to shake, held them in place when she started sighing his name over and over and over again. Each time breathier. Each time higher.

He slipped two fingers inside her, groaning loudly when they slid in so easily. He moved them in and out, torturously slow as he continued to mouth her.

_“Ben.”_

_Come._

_“Oh, oh Ben.”_

_Come._

_“Oh, oh!”_

Her back came off the bed, and he pressed down on her legs with one arm as she shook. His tongue moved rapidly as she rose to his mouth, his fingers curving so he could feel her clench around him.

She came back down with a massive sigh, and he removed his mouth, gently retracting his fingers. When she sat up again to look at him, her hair was stuck to her cheek and neck.

He stared back at her with swollen lips and a sopping chin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so the fun begins. Feel free to find me on Tumblr under OkaaraGem if you ever want to talk about Star Wars/Reylo/or Game of Thrones!


	7. Chapter 7

_"I get to go to your house?” Rey bobbed up and down as she climbed into the passenger seat._

_Ben, needless to say, was less enthused. “I forgot my wallet. I just need to stop in, grab it, and then we can go to the store.”_

_“I get to see where you live,” Rey grinned, and Ben sighed._

_“You’ll be disappointed.”_

_Rey ignored him, bouncing wildly in her seat and kicking her feet against the glove compartment. With a small prayer to the God he didn’t believe in, Ben started the car and began the journey to his house._

_He didn’t expect to see his father’s_ Falcon _in the driveway._

_“Fuck,” Ben muttered._

_“Fuck,” Rey repeated, not knowing the reason for his curse but just happy to repeat it._

_“Stay in the car,” Ben told Rey, unclipping his belt and stopping the vehicle._

_He hopped out and strutted toward his house, his hands already curled into fists. Han and Leia turned as they entered, the latter rising from the dining room chair._

_“Hey, kid,” Han said tensely._

_Ben swallowed, trying to keep his voice in check but failing. “What are you doing here?”_

_“Thought I’d drop by and see how things were around here.”_

_“They’re great,” he replied through gritted teeth._

_Leia looked between the two men, for once not knowing what to say. Maybe it was better that way. Ben had no doubts that she would gravitate to his father’s side if given the chance._

_“How’s Dameron?” Han inquired, scratching at his neck._

_“Fine.”_

_“…You still going to fly with him?”_

_Ben’s temper spiked. “How many times do I have to tell you I don’t want to be a fucking pilot?”_

_“Language, Ben!” Leia chastised._

_His father’s eyes narrowed, and his jaw set in a hard line, indicating, he too, was close to blowing a fuse. He opened his mouth, probably with the intention to spew something back at his son, when his eyes flickered down to Ben’s right._

_“Who the hell’s that?”_

_Ben jerked his head and discovered Rey had wandered inside. She stood behind him, looking around at the inside of his house. Now that she saw the attention was focused on her, however, she took a step closer to him._

_“I thought I said to wait in the car,” Ben hissed._

_“Who is that?” Han asked again._

_“Is this the girl you’re babysitting, Ben?” his mother questioned._

_Ben’s face turned bright red. Han didn’t know about his job, and although Ben knew he shouldn’t care about what his father thought, the admission was downright embarrassing to him. Sure enough, his father raised a skeptical eyebrow._

_“Babysitting?”_

_Rey chose this moment to speak up. “We’re mates,” she clarified, gripping the side of Ben’s pants seam. “I’m Rey,” she added._

_“It’s nice to meet you Rey,” Leia said, trying to dissolve the tension that everyone in the room but Rey felt._

_Han kept looking between Rey and Ben, curiosity written all over his face. Ben would be damned if he had to answer any of his father’s questions about his part-time job._

_“I just need to grab my wallet,” he muttered, reaching down and retracting Rey’s hand before taking the item off the dining room table. He turned to go. “Come on, Rey.”_

_“Okay.” She paused, and then to Ben’s horror, she looked right at Han. “I’m going to be a pilot.”_

_So she had heard more of the conversation than he had thought._

_Han stared at Ben instead of her, his mouth moving to the side. “Well, that makes one of you.”_

_Ben grabbed Rey’s hand, perhaps rougher than necessary, and led her out the house, slamming the door behind them. When he clipped her into the truck, she looked at him curiously._

_“Were those your parents?” she asked._

_Ben closed the passenger door, so he didn’t have to answer._

\---

 

Ben felt like a teenager again.

Not that he had frequently done this sort of thing as a teenager, but it felt like the type of thing that teenagers did. Going to his house wasn’t an option, obviously, but she had been more than willing to offer up her apartment.

They had departed the party at separate times, so as not to arouse suspicion. Rey had insisted Finn and Poe wouldn’t care if they knew, but Ben had still been uncomfortable with the prospect, so she honored his wishes.

When he arrived at her apartment he didn’t know what to expect. Would they tear each other’s clothes off? Would things be awkward? Would he mess it all up?

The door was unlocked, and he twisted the knob and stepped inside. It was mostly dark, save for a small light in the corner of the room.

“Rey?” Ben called hesitantly, looking around. His heard turned when he heard the sink in the bathroom run.

“Just a moment,” she called back.

Ben took a seat on her futon, nervously tapping his foot. He loosened his collar, finding it was suddenly choking his neck. The strands on the back of his head were sweaty.

Rey emerged with a clean face and slightly damp hair. Her dress had been replaced with a t-shirt and shorts, allowing him an even more generous view of her legs.

“Sorry,” she said, sweeping her hair over her shoulder. “I just couldn’t stand to have that clay on my face any longer.”

“It’s alright,” Ben said, his foot still tapping.

“Would you like anything?” Rey asked, walking over to her kitchen and getting herself a glass of water.

“No.”

Rey drained the glass and placed it on the countertop before sitting next to him on the futon. She was staring at him, and it unnerved Ben.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” he whispered.

Even in the dim lighting, Ben could see she was blushing wildly, and he was painfully aware he had yet to have his own release.

Rey looked down at her hands. “I…um…I’m really glad Finn’s marrying Poe.”

Ben blinked, thrown off by the conversation. “Uh, yeah. Me too.”

“They’re a great couple.”

“Yeah.”

“And if it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have run into you again.”

She didn’t seem like she knew what to do with her hands, so she folded them in her lap. Ben was starting to suspect she was just as nervous as he was.

“I meant what I said before,” she said, coming closer. Ben was stone still as she leaned in. “I’ve really missed you.”

Her lips touched his neck and Ben closed his eyes, his heart hammering. He wasn’t sure how to respond to her statement. Yes, he had missed her too, although he had never admitted it to anyone. Even so, it seemed inappropriate for him to talk about their past, especially when her tongue began tracing his jaw.

“What you did before,” she breathed, “it felt really good.”

She placed a leg over him, straddling him, and Ben lost his composure.

He grabbed her hips and pulled her onto his erection, groaning as he felt her through her thin layers. He crushed his mouth to hers, rolling his hips and relishing in her gasp. Her hands went to his belt buckle, fumbling with the clasps until his erection sprang free. He stood, balancing her thighs in his hands as he deposited her onto the bed.

His hands came up the inside of her shirt, and he groaned when he discovered she wasn’t wearing a bra. She lifted her arms and he removed her shirt easily, and then his own when she tried fumbling with his buttons.

“I don’t have a condom,” she panted as he fiercely sucked her neck, “but I do have an implant.”

“We don’t have to,” he told her, but his mind screamed in relief when she whispered back, “I want to.”

The rest of their clothes came off, and then Ben was positioning himself at her entrance. He slid in slowly, his eyelids fluttering as he felt how slick she was. She grabbed the back of his neck and forced his lips to hers as he began to move, her hips coming up to meet his.

He already knew he wasn’t going to last long, and he debated pulling out or slowing down to prolong it, but she was making these delicious sounds and he felt selfish. He took a nipple in between his teeth, biting softly as he rode her, anything for her to keep making those noises.

She said his name again, whispered it, cried it, and he tensed, finally spilling into her. He thrust a few more times, riding out his climax, and then slowly pulled out. When his hand went to her clit she stopped him.

“It’s okay,” she said.

He frowned. “But-”

“I don’t mind, really,” she insisted. She tugged his head down again to kiss him.

“What is this?” he gestured between them when they broke apart, because he was stupid and foolish, and he just had to know.

Rey paused. “It can be anything you want it to be.”

Ben gazed at her. He watched the beautiful flush of her chest, her hard nipples, the gleam of sweat on her upper lip. It was all so surreal.

“Okay,” he said, kissing her softly. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be a little longer, I promise. I’ll post soon!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to check me out on Tumblr under OkaaraGem. I am always available to discuss Star Wars and Reylo, so hit me up anytime! Also thank you for all the lovely comments!!! I read every single one and they mean so much to me!

_“Rey, come out.”_

_“Just a minute! I’m, er, fixing my hair!”_

_“That’s what you said five minutes ago. We both know you don’t care about your hair that much.”_

_Ben tugged uncomfortably at his wrinkled button down. Leia had insisted on knowing the reason for his shirt choice, but he would be damned if he told her what he was doing that evening._

_“Rey, come on. I look like a loser out here without a date,” he said, changing tactics._

_That seemed to do it. She emerged from the school bathroom a moment later, wearing a puffy, light, brown dress that ended just below her knees. Her hair was down, and one piece was curled in the front, making it seem like she had tried to form it with an iron but then gave up on the first strand. She was make-up free except for a smear of clay across her lips, which looked as though it had been wiped off last minute._

_“The lipstick was Jessika’s idea,” she explained, referring to the friend whose parents had driven her there._

_Ben nodded. “I’m sure it was.” He paused. “You look nice.” Girls liked to hear that, didn’t they?_

_Rey blushed a deep red, and then strode right up to him. She tugged on his shirt. “Where’d you get this?”_

_He shrugged. “My house.”_

_“It looks like you found it in a bush.”_

_Ben smiled. “You’re probably right.”_

\---

 

Ben glanced down as Rey’s fingers threaded with his own while they walked. He swallowed heavily; he still was not quite used to showing affection in public. After a moment though, he squeezed her hand back, forcing himself to relax. She was his for the time being, even if he didn’t think he deserved it.

“Dinner was excellent,” she remarked, swinging their arms despite the rigidity in his appendage. “I don’t think I care much for seafood though.”

He snorted. “You didn’t seem to have a problem at the bachelor party.”

“What do you mean?”

“You were stuffing your face with crab cake.”

Rey blushed violently. “I was starving. Sue me.”

“It wasn’t a bad thing. It was just…interesting to watch.” There was a chuckle in Ben’s voice as he swing the back of her hand up to kiss it.

Rey turned to look out at the bay. “Let’s sit on the docks.”

“I thought you were just complaining about the sea.”

“Oh, hush,” she said dragging him in the direction of the water.

They found a place by the end of the dock, a secluded area with few boats or people. Rey promptly sat down and hung her legs over the edge, and Ben copied her position. They sat in comfortable silence, their hands still interlocked.

Ben watched as the breeze ruffled Rey’s hair. She had worn it down again tonight, and he wondered if she knew he preferred it this way…mostly because he loved to run his fingers through it.

She tilted her head back and stared up at the sky. “I don’t have my license,” she said.

He blinked, not entirely sure what that had to do with anything. “Okay.”

“I don’t have it because I failed my driver’s test. Three times.”

“You live in a city. You don’t exactly need a car.”

Rey shook her head. “That’s not the point. It just…it disheartened me. If I can’t even operate a car how could I ever…”

Ben’s realized what she was telling him.

Rey laughed shakily. “To think, all those times when you let me steer your truck…it didn’t help.”

“Cars and planes aren’t the same.”

“I know but…it’s embarrassing Ben. Besides, the aircraft I could operate without a valid driver’s license are limited.”

“You’re friends with two pilots,” Ben told her, trying to rationalize. “The opportunity is right there, you just have to-”

“I don’t really want to talk about this anymore,” she cut him off, staring down into her lap. “I don’t know why I brought it up.”

Watching her now, her cheeks red and her lips turned down in a grimace, Ben realized he might not be the only one coping with failure.

“I could give you lessons,” he offered, half-expecting her to snap at him. “In my car. I’m no teacher but…it’s not like I have anything else to do.”

Rey glanced up in surprise. “Ben-”

“I know we have wedding duties, but the ceremony isn’t for another three weeks. We could-”

Rey leaned forward and pressed her mouth to his, cutting him off abruptly. His hands instantly came up to grip her arms as he moved to deepen the kiss. Her lips and tongue were sweet as they ran against his mouth, and sure enough his fingers found themselves in her hair. Somewhere off in the distance he heard the sound of a boat motor.

“Is that….Han that’s your boy!”

Ben’s blood ran cold, and he pulled apart from Rey. The two turned to see a medium sized boat pulling up close to the dock. Sure enough, Han was there with a group of men Ben didn’t recognize. The only one who looked vaguely familiar was Chewie, Han’s old friend who he had occasionally brought around the house when Ben was younger. All he could remember about the man was that he didn’t speak much, and that he was taller than most skyscrapers.

“Didn’t expect to see you here, kid,” Han said, leaning against the side of the boat.

As the vessel came closer to the dock, his father impulsively hopped over the edge and landed next to them. Ben visibly stiffened, and Rey placed a hand on his forearm.

Han glanced from back and forth between the two. “This your girlfriend? You didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend.”

Ben stood up and Rey moved to mirror his position.  

“And when would I have been able to tell you something like that?” Ben asked, his voice already strained with barely concealed anger.

Han didn’t answer, but his eyes flickered to Rey. He cocked his head to the side. “I know you from somewhere?”

Rey held out her hand. “I’m Rey. It’s, um, nice to meet you, Mr. Solo.” She cast a tentative look at Ben as Han reached out to shake her hand.

“Rey…huh?”

Ben could tell Rey’s name and appearance struck him familiar, but he doubted his father would be able to remember he had met the girl fourteen years ago, when she was just a child.

“We were just going,” Ben said curtly, placing his hand on Rey’s back.

“Ben.”

He paused, waiting for whatever it was his father had to say to him.

Han tugged at his collar, glancing back at the boat briefly before watching his son. “I’m, uh, thinking of moving back in with your mother.”

Ben stared at him blankly. “Let me know when you’ve figured it out,” he responded, his voice devoid of emotion. “Come on, Rey,” he said quietly, and she cast one small look at his father before following him off the dock.

She didn’t bring up Han that night, for which he was grateful. They took solace in her apartment, as they normally did. The more time Ben spent there, the less he wanted to return home.

He rose early the next morning, dressing silently before Rey rose. She wasn’t the most delicately sleeper; her mouth was wide open and her hair was a tangled mess. He sat on the edge of the bed and moved some tangles off her face. Then he stood, gathered his things, and left for the day.

He walked down the street, strolling down a familiar route with boutiques and shops of all sorts. That’s when he paused in front of the arts and crafts store. They were still hiring. Ben took a shuddering breath, and then pushed his way inside.

If the encounter with his father had told him anything, it was that he finally needed to get his shit together.

 

\---

 

_Ben and Rey sat down at a cafeteria table, the pink and blue lights forcing Ben to squint his eyes in irritation. A couple of the dads at the event had attempted polite conversation, but Ben was wary of their gazes, and he didn’t want them getting the wrong idea, so he brushed them off the best he could. He glanced at Rey, who was picking a hole into the plastic tablecloth._

_“Do you want something to eat?”_

_Rey shook her head._

_“Do you want to talk to your friends?”_

_“I don’t have many friends.”_

_“Oh.”_

_Ben was torn between feeling anxious and annoyed. Fuck it all, he wanted her to have a good time, but she seemed downright miserable. Why did she beg him to go to this stupid thing if she didn’t even want to be here?_

_“Rey, what’s wrong?”_

_She shrugged, but she glanced wistfully at the dance floor, watching as the daughters danced with their fathers._

_Something in Ben’s mind clicked. “Do you…want to dance?”_

_Rey’s eyes snapped to his, and her face became a cross of outrage and delight._

_“This music sucks,” she told him._

_The corner of Ben’s mouth quirked up. “I know. Is that a yes?”_

_“You don’t want to dance.”_

_“It’s not about what I want.”_

_Rey looked torn, and Ben suspected she didn’t like admitting to wanting to do something she considered to be ‘girly.’ He would have to take the lead on this one._

_While normally the prospect of doing something like this would be downright horrifying, he thought he would go crazy if Rey became the sulking one in their relationship._

_He stood up and tugged on her hand. “Come on.”_

_Rey blinked up at him, and then rose from her seat. She straightened out her dress and followed Ben to the edge of the dance floor. Ben took both of her tiny hands in his, and they danced at arms length._

_He felt ridiculous._

_Rey seemed to be enjoying herself though. She was smiling the most she had all evening. As her eyes roamed the dance floor, Ben watched as she observed all the daughters standing on their father’s feet. She turned back to him with a downright evil look, and Ben gulped nervously._

_With a jump, Rey landed on his feet with her full weight, and Ben held back a yelp of pain. He glared down at her._

_“What are you? Some kind of demon?”_

_Rey giggled ferociously, and then buried her cheek in his abdomen, squeezing him in a hug. Ben’s entire face changed to a bright red, and he swore his ears would melt off. He felt like everyone in the room was watching them, even though he knew no one was. This entire situation was so bizarre._

_“Thanks for taking me, Ben,” she murmured, her voice slightly muffled by his shirt._

_Ben stared down at the top of her head. “You’re welcome.”_


	9. Chapter 9

_All Ben could see was red._

_He slammed on the breaks of his beat up truck, nearly hitting Plutt’s equally shitty car in front of the condo. He slumped in his seat and waited for the old man to come out. He didn’t particularly feel like talking to the shit today._

_So Ben slumped, practically to the floor. Then he pulled out the half empty bottle of Jack._

_He took a few more chugs, realizing the substance was probably affecting him more than he thought. He didn’t care. He didn’t care about anything._

_Fucking Han. Ben couldn’t even remember exactly how their latest fight had started, but it had been bad. Leia had screamed. Ben had thrown a vase at his father’s head. The old man had ducked just in time, and pieces of china shattered into millions of pieces as it impacted the wall behind him._

_In that moment Ben thought he might actually kill his father. And that terrified him._

_So he broke into Leia’s bar and grabbed the first thing he could find. Then he cracked open the bottle and drove to Rey’s place._

_And here he was._

_It was really irresponsible to be here, but he had nowhere else to go, and besides, he wasn’t thinking clearly. He just watched, his head bobbing slightly as Plutt stumbled out to his car. The deadbeat clambered into his vehicle and drove away. Ben took another swig and then moved out of the truck, slamming the door harder than necessary._

_He pushed inside the condo, the door whacking violently against the interior. Rey was on the floor, wearing her pilot’s helmet._

_Ben grinned when he saw her, his anger temporarily melting._

_“You still wearing that fucking thing?”_

_“Fucking!” Rey repeated, and then removed the helmet. “Yeah, I am. It’s my favorite.”_

_Ben leaned against the wall to her left. “You going to fly me up in the air or what, kid?”_

_Rey’s smile slowly faded as she stared at him, taking in his mannerisms. Her eyebrows furrowed. “What’s wrong with you?”_

_“Nothing’s wrong.” Everything was wrong. Ben ungracefully turned and slammed his back against the wall. The whisky sloshed in his stomach._

_Rey stood up. She walked over to him with narrowed eyes. “You’re shaky.”_

_Ben glared at her, suddenly pissed off again. “Shut up.”_

_Rey stamped on his foot. “_ You  _shut up.” She frowned when he didn’t react. “Ben?”_

_He placed his hand on a side table to steady himself, but he misjudged the distance and his grip faltered. He fell to his knees. Then he vomited._

_Rey screamed._

\---

 

“Make sure your foot is on the break. Nope. That’s the gas.”

“I _know_ that, Ben Solo. I was just testing you _._ ”

“Sure.” Ben grinned.

It was a miracle they had found a secluded parking lot in a place like Coruscant, truly it was. But they would need such a space if Ben was going to teach Rey to drive. He discovered very quickly why it was she had failed her driving test so many times.

She was a maniac.

“Ease on the gas. _Ease!_ ” Ben clutched his seat as the car burst forward violently. Rey slammed on the break just as quickly, and they were momentarily jostled back and forth.

She winced. “Oops.”

Ben closed his eyes and leaned back against the seat, releasing a whoosh of breath. “We’re going to have to try something else.”

Rey sighed. “This is hopeless.”

Ben looked at her. “Don’t say that. We’ve only just started.”

“Be honest. You already want to off yourself, don’t you?”

Ben chuckled. “Not yet.” He paused. “Although I would appreciate you not killing me. My first day is tomorrow.”

Rey stared at him blankly. “You…got a job?”

Ben nodded, trying not to make it seem like a big deal, but hoping she would be proud of him anyway.

She was.

Perhaps a little too proud.

“Ben, that’s brilliant!” she cried, launching herself across the seat to embrace him.

The car wasn’t in park.

After a couple moments of screaming and reorienting, Rey turned off the ignition. “That’s probably enough for one day,” she said breathlessly.

Ben nodded, his hair an absolute mess. “We’ll start fresh another time.”

“I bet you’re regretting offering to teach me.”

“You need a teacher,” he responded. “It might as well be me.”

Rey took his hand. “I’m so happy for you, Ben. I know how much you’ve wanted this.”

“We aren’t still talking about driving, are we?”

She rolled her eyes, and then unclipped her seatbelt. She climbed over him, accidently jabbing an elbow into his face in the process.

“Ow!”

“Sorry.”

“What are you doing?” he asked in bewilderment as she reached down and tugged on the seat adjuster so the bottom slid all the way back.

“Ben, honestly, you’re intelligent. Figure it out.”

She crouched in the space created by the seat movement. Then her hands reached for his belt.

“Rey,” he hissed, his realization causing a jolt of excitement and anxiety to race through him. “We’re in public.”

“It’s almost dark,” she pointed out, and that was enough convincing for him.

Ben closed his eyes again as she manipulated his clothing. After several seconds of shuffling and shifting clothes, her mouth eventually found him, wetting the tip of his cock. She moved over him agonizingly slow. His hand found the back of her head, loosely tangling his fingers into her hair.

_“Fuck,”_ he swore softly as her tongue traced just under his head. He glanced down, watching her move with her eyes closed, a focused expression on her face.

One of her hands came up to run over his abdomen under his shirt. He caught her hand and bent his neck, taking one of her fingers in his mouth.

She paused, releasing his cock and looking up at him with interest. He smirked against her hand and tugged her upwards, moving to undress her bottom half. Soon she was straddling him, but not without complications. Ben had admittedly never had car sex, and he wasn’t prepared for how crowded it would be. Not that he was complaining.

He brought his hands to Rey’s hips as she bounced against him, their lips a tangled mess. Ben brought his hand to the back of her head, using her hair to jerk it back delicately. He dipped so he could suck noisily on her neck, groaning as she landed on him from a particularly satisfying angle.

He could tell she was close. Her breathing usually became quiet at the very end, as if she were focusing solely on the feeling of fucking him. She wove her fingers into his hair, crushing his face into her neck as she moved her hips desperately.

“You going to cum?” he muttered, egging her on as he attacked her neck again.

_“Yes,”_ she gasped, “ _Oh, Ben.”_

“I fucking love it when you say my name.”

With a few more bounces she was shuddering violently, and her mouth opened in a silent ‘oh’ as she came. Ben let her ride him for as long as she needed to, and only when she came down did he knock the front seat all the way back. He flipped her over, reconnecting them and hovering as he pressed a searing kiss to her mouth.

He didn’t last long after that.

 

\---

 

Ben sat in the backroom of the arts and crafts shop after his first shift. His trainer had mentioned he could always help himself to any of the supplies they had in storage, and Ben intended to take him up on that offer. He tucked a few paintbrushes and paints into his pockets. Who knows, maybe he would get back into his favorite hobby.

In all honesty, his first day had gone better then expected. Sure, he interacted with more people than he would have liked, but they were all around decent, and most seemed eager to actually learn about drawing or painting. He could respect that.

As he drove home, he realized the car still smelled of sex, and he became slightly hard from the memory of fucking Rey. That woman would be the death of him.

His phone buzzed and he paused at a red light before reaching down to check on it.

_Remember our dinner is tomorrow night. Don’t be late._ It was from Poe.

“Fuck,” Ben cursed, running a hand over his forehead. He had forgotten his promise to Poe that he would go out with him and his coworkers. Well, more like had been roped into it.

**_I’ll be there_** _,_ he responded.

_Good. Finn’s coming too._

Ben hesitated before texting back. **_Is it alright if I bring someone?_**

Poe’s response was immediate. _Holy shit. You’re bringing a date, aren’t you? You have a girlfriend. Ben Solo has a fucking girlfriend. I’m right, aren’t I? That’s why you’ve been MIA???_

Ben stifled a grimace. **_I haven’t been MIA._**

_No explanations needed, my friend_. _Can’t wait to meet her. Don’t be late._

Ben didn’t respond, for the light turned green and he was driving again. He leaned his head back against his driver’s seat with a sigh. He was already starting to regret bringing it up to Poe, but he knew it was high time he and Finn knew the truth. Besides, he _really_ didn’t want to spend an evening surrounded by only pilots.

So of course it made perfect sense to bring a wannabe pilot with him.

Rey would be thrilled, of course. She had wanted to tell Poe and Finn about their relationship since the beginning, but she was holding out for Ben’s benefit. He wasn’t good at explaining things to people, or really sharing how he felt, or any of that stuff. This was going to be a first for him.

He pulled into his driveway and exhaled when he didn’t see his father’s _Falcon._ So Han hadn’t decided to move back in right away, after all. Ben was definitely relieved. He was.

But as he shut the door, he vehemently ignored the fact that he was also disappointed.

 

\---

 

_Plutt had laughed when he found out._

_“You’re not upset?” Ben asked stoically, watching the vile man wipe some spittle from his chin._

_“Upset? Why the fuck would I be upset? Everyone hits the bottle now and again.” Plutt clapped him on the shoulder roughly. “Don’t worry. I won’t rat to your parents either.”_

_“It won’t happen again when I’m with her.”_

_“As long as you’re watching her, I don’t care what the fuck else you do.”_

_And with that statement, Ben hated this man even more, but not more than he already hated himself. As Plutt went to the fridge to grab himself a sandwich, Ben heard a small pattering of feet scrambling away in the distance. He turned his head and saw a brief glimpse of orange. The orange from Rey’s pilot helmet._

_Plutt followed his gaze. “Eh, don’t mind her. She’s soft for that shit. Parents were druggies, ya know? Sold her off for drinking money…which reminds me.” He dug inside his pocket and withdrew a couple hundreds. “That’s for last month, and for that fucking dance.”_

_Ben wordlessly pocketed the money. His eyes remained in the place Rey had been, eavesdropping on them._

_He felt sick to his stomach._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben Solo and Rey need a hug :(


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If any of you are interested in reading Star Wars universe Reylo, I’ve got another fun story up my sleeve. It will be called “Space Virgins” and will feature a pissed off Uncle Luke as he keep cock blocking his nephew via Force dreams.

_“Rey? Can I come in?” When she didn’t answer he gently wrapped on her door again. “Rey?”_

_“Are you drunk?” he heard her ask from the other side of the door._

_Ben grimaced. “No.”_

_There was a long pause and then. “Fine. Come in.”_

_He opened her door delicately, as if he thought it would shatter. She sat on her bed, her back to him. She faced her wall and she had several broken crayons by her feet as she scribbled on a piece of paper. Ben sat on the edge of her bed._

_“Hey,” he said, reaching for her shoulder. As soon as his hand brushed her skin she jerked away violently, and shifted further away from him. “Rey…”_

_“Are you going to say you’re sorry?”_

_He swallowed. “Would that make it better?”_

_“No.”_

_“Well, I’ll say it anyway. I’m sorry.”_

_She continued scribbling._

_“Would you…want to get some ice cream?”_

_She turned around to glare daggers at him. “That’s not going to make it better either.”_

_Damn. She always saw right through him._

_He huffed. “What do you want me to do then?”_

_“I don’t know!” And then she was crying, big ugly tears streaming down her face. He flinched when she punched him in the chest. “You’re a stupid idiot!”_

_He wound his arms around her, to prevent her from hitting him again. She struggled for a few moments, and she just collapsed, crying noisily._

_“I know,” he said, his voice choked. “I’m a stupid, fucking idiot.”_

_“Fucking idiot,” she repeated miserably, wiping her face on his t-shirt._

_Ben pressed his cheek against the top of her head, his eyes trailing down to her drawing, forgotten on the bed. She had drawn them both in separate planes, and she looked like she was shooting him down._

_It was beautiful._

_\---_

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured against her neck, his hand already snaking up her thigh.

“Ben,” she pushed at his chest half-heartedly.

“What? Don’t tell me you’re opposed to car sex now?”

She burst out laughing. “Not when we’re right outside the bloody restaurant!”

He sighed, relenting. “Alright.”

He got out of the car and moved to the passenger side to open the door for her. She raised an eyebrow at the unnecessary gesture, but he just shrugged. Rey stepped out wearing a simple, blood red dress that ended right above the knee. She had said it wasn’t her color, but Ben loved the way it looked on her. He himself was wearing a black button down and dress pants. He had even blow-dried his hair, or rather, Rey had forced him down as she blow-dried it.

“Poe will never forgive you if you show up with wet hair,” she had said.

Rey had walked to his mother’s condo to meet him. It was a surprise to see her there, and if he were being honest he would have preferred that she sent him a text beforehand. Leia had given him a _very_ suspicious look when he had left, especially after she discovered the name of his date was Rey.

He didn’t bother bringing his anxieties up to Rey though. He knew he was making a bigger fuss than necessary, and besides, he couldn’t be annoyed with her when she was looking like that.

As they entered the restaurant, he traced a careful finger down her exposed neck, and she shook him off, shooting him a look, but smiling anyway. She turned as she heard someone call her name, and Ben recognized the familiar group of the air traffic control workers that were at the bachelor party.

“You know them?” he asked her.

She raised an eyebrow. “Not well, but I actually manage to make polite conversation from time to time.”

Ben rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

As they scooted into the low, leather booth across from the workers, Ben discovered very quickly that Poe and Finn were absent. He sent Poe a quick text as Rey attempted said ‘polite conversation,’ under the low lighting of the restaurant.

**_Where are you?_ **

_Running late. Be there soon, my bad._

**_Just fucking get here._ **

_Oh, blow me. Talk with that date of yours until we get there._

Ben sighed as he tucked his phone back into his pocket. He ordered Rey and him some drinks, virgin for him of course.

“What did he say?” Rey questioned.

“They’re running late.”

“Of _course_ Poe is,” one of the workers, Jessika maybe, spoke up. “I swear that man delays his own flights.”

The other workers laughed good-naturedly and as the minutes passed, Ben was forced to listen to pilot banter and even participate sometimes. By the time Rey finished her second drink, he could see that her cheeks were quite rosy, and he became mischievous.

She propped her chin in her hand, nodding occasionally as Poe and Finn’s coworkers regaled them with another story. To be honest, she was probably more interested than she let on. She _did_ want to be a pilot after all.

He watched her stiffen as his hand touched her bare knee. She narrowed her eyes at him when he began to trial upwards.

She casually leaned over to him as the workers burst out in a round of drunken laughter. “What do you think you’re doing?” Her lips tickled his ear.

“Tell me to stop,” he replied, moving his hand upwards.

She didn’t, but she ordered another drink for herself.

He fingers eventually came to the edge of her panties, and she spread her legs a little farther as she took another sip of her drink. Another worker, Harold, asked Rey what she thought about the upcoming local election, and Ben hid a smile as she attempted to form an articulate response.

“I think it’s great that more diverse c-candidates are running these days,” she supplied, just as Ben’s fingers slipped into her underwear. She scooted forward. “I would be lying if I said I had decided who to vote for this time around though.”

“That’s understandable,” Harold was saying, and then thankfully he turned to Jessika to gather her opinion.

Rey sent a small glare at Ben as the pads of his fingers began touching her clit. He made sure to keep his eyes off her, pretending to nod in interest as the workers started a new conversation.

Her hand came out to grip his knee underneath the table as he slid a finger into her. He curved his right hand, moving painfully slowly, and swallowing a groan when he felt how wet she was. He added another finger, and she gave a small jolt, and she took another sip of her drink self-consciously.

“Are you okay, Rey?” Jessika asked. “Your face is bright red.”

Rey gave a choked laugh. “It’s rather hot in here, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is,” Harold agreed. He grinned. “I’ll order us some frozen drinks.”

“Good idea,” Ben said, adding a third finger and moving faster. He watched Rey bite her bottom lip.

His thumb came up to rub her clit a few more times before he focused solely on the feeling of penetrating her with his fingers. He had to keep a slow, steady pace for the most part, but by the shallow rise of Rey’s chest, he could tell it was effective. He curved his fingers sharply and thrust a few more times, and then her eyes fluttered shut. She contracted around his fingers, and he ran his other hand over his face to hide his pleased expression. When he felt her body relax, he removed his fingers, wiping them on his dress pants.

Rey finished her third drink.

Ten minutes later, Poe and Finn finally made an appearance.

“Rey!” Finn said, clearly pleased to see her there. “What…” he glanced back and forth between Rey and Ben.

Poe burst out laughing. “No fucking way. Ben you animal!” Ben glowered at his friend, but Poe waved him off. “I kid of course. Rey, he’s a gentleman, I swear.”

Rey cast Ben a look. “Yes, he’s been quite the gentleman tonight.”

His ears became bright red.

Finn and Poe slid into a couple chairs across from them.

“How did this happen?” Finn asked, surprise still on his face.

“And spare no details,” Poe added with a wink.

Rey burst out laughing while Ben groaned in exasperation.

 

\---

 

After he had made sure Rey got home safely that night, Ben went home and immediately changed into something comfier. He was relieved to think that after the wedding, he wouldn’t have to dress up nearly this much.

“…Did you have fun?”

Ben glanced up to find Leia in his doorway. Her expression was hesitant, but other than that, it was hard to read.

“Yeah,” he replied cautiously.

Leia cleared her throat. “Rey seems nice.”

“She is.”

His mother sighed. “Ben…”

“If you’re going to lecture me, I’m not in the mood.”

Leia frowned. “I’m not going to lecture you, but I’m allowed to be concerned. She’s…quite a bit younger-”

His jaw clenched. “This sounds like lecturing. Don’t you have your own problems to deal with, Mother?”

That shut her up. It was a low blow to bring up her complications with Han, he knew, but she had no right to come in here and lecture him about his choices. Not anymore.

Leia nodded, her face becoming stone once more. “I’ll leave you.”

She turned to go and then, for some stupid reason, Ben blurted, “I got a job.”

Leia paused in the doorway, and Ben noticed for the first time how sad her eyes were. “I’m proud of you.”

And then he was left to process the first real conversation they had had in days.


	11. Chapter 11

_Ben made sure over the next couple of months to spoil Rey rotten. He got her the best candy, played pilot whenever she asked, and even tried on that godforsaken helmet._

_She knew what he was doing of course, she was far too clever not to, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy the benefits._

_One day, late in the summer, Rey requested he push her on the swing._

_“Don’t hold back,” she insisted, gripping the metal chain tightly._

_“I’m not,” Ben grunted, as he gave her another shove. He was. She was far too little for him not to._

_During one push Rey went flying, and for one awful moment, Ben thought he had killed her. Instead, the little devil landed in a crouch and then spun around._

_“Don’t do that again!” he snapped._

_Rey placed her hands on her hips, thoroughly unimpressed with his commands. “Bet you couldn’t land on_ your _feet.”_

_Ben hadn’t been on a swing since he was six, but how could he refuse a challenge?_

_Hours later, when they were drawing at her kitchen table, Ben noticed Rey could barely keep her eyes open._

_“You should go to bed,” he advised._

_“Shut up,” she told him, but she leaned against her fist._

_Ben scooped her up, half-expecting her to protest. Instead she pressed her cheek against his shoulder and made some sort of sleep-deprived grunt. He carried her to her room and tucked her into bed, making sure to pull the comforter up past her shoulders.  
“Don’t go,” she complained, and he rolled his eyes but honored her request. _

_She began snoring noisily, just as Ben heard the growl of Plutt’s car in the driveway. He cast one last look at the sleeping girl before moving into the kitchen to meet the man._

_“Here,” Plutt grunted, handing him two hundred dollars. “That’ll be all.”_

_“What?” Ben asked, as he took the money._

_Plutt moved his cigarette to the other side of his mouth. “Fucking tired of Coruscant. Was just looking at properties the other day. In Jakku. We’re moving there in the next couple of weeks.”_

_Ben didn’t know how to feel about this. He was confused, and disappointed, and then angry, and then…mostly just confused._

_“You’ve done alright with her,” Plutt continued, gesturing towards her bedroom door. “But Jakku’s farther than your piece of shit truck can take you.” He nodded to Ben. “Alright, son. Off with you.”_

_Ben swallowed heavily._

\---

 

“See? That wasn’t so difficult,” Ben told her as she finished reversing.

Rey huffed, her breath knocking a wisp of hair out of her face. “Sure, on the fortieth try maybe.”

“Better than fifty.”

Rey smirked and then leaned over to plant a kiss on Ben’s mouth. The car lurched unexpectedly, and she hurriedly put the vehicle into park. “Sorry.”

Ben shook his head in amusement. “You know, kid. I think you might be ready.”

“You think so?”

“We’ve been at it nearly every day. You’ve even got parallel parking mastered. I don’t know what else there is to teach.”

Rey turned off the engine, and the car quieted. “I guess I should start the process of applying again.” She shook her head. “My fourth attempt.”

“You’ll ace it.”

Rey grinned. “Want to get dinner?”

Ben frowned. “I can’t tonight.”

“Looking at more apartments?”

“Yeah.”

“I could come with you this time,” Rey suggested.

He shook his head. “It’s just something I’d rather do by myself. It’s hard to explain.”

“Alright, Ben Solo, whatever you say.” She made to move out of the car, but he held her wrist.

“I don’t have to go _just_ yet,” he told her, his hand already sneaking under her shirt.

She raised an eyebrow.

 

\---

 

Much, much later, Ben pulled his car outside his mother’s condo. He placed the vehicle into park and leaned his head back with an exhausted sigh. He had forgotten how tedious it was to look for new housing. At least the places he had seen were decent and reasonably priced. He just needed a few more weeks to save up and soon he would be out of here.

Ben jumped as someone opened the passenger door, and he snapped his head to the side when Han casually climbed in, shutting the door behind him.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Ben demanded, his voice harsh more out of surprise than anger.

“Thought we could have a chat. Just drive, kid.”

Ben stared at his father who regarded him coolly. He wanted to punch that expression right off his face.

So he wasn’t exactly sure why he stepped on the brake, and then shifted to ‘drive.’

They drove in silence for a very long time. They drove out of their borough; they drove out of Coruscant. Ben didn’t even know where they were anymore, but the roads were narrower and shrouded with trees.

“You going to talk, or did you just want to bleed my tank dry?” Ben questioned, glaring daggers at the road in front of him. He flicked on his high beams as the streetlights became fewer and farther between.

“Your mother told me about that girl of yours,” Han said casually, stretching out his legs and crossing his arms.

Ben’s grip on the wheel tightened exponentially.

Han raised an eyebrow. “Well? Is it true? She the one you looked after?”

He was silent.

Han snorted. “Far be it from me to tell you to stay away from younger women. Must run in the Solo bloodline-”

“I’m not with her because of her age,” Ben snapped, pressing on the gas, the car slowly picking up speed.

Han chuckled. “Come on now, Ben. You don’t have to lie to your old man. I’m good for something, you know. I could…help you with these things.”

“Help? Help how? The last time you were here, the last time you were _really_ here, you broke Leia’s heart-”

“Look, I’ve made some mistakes,” Han replied, his voice hard, “but that doesn’t mean I’m not trying. And don’t call your mother that.”

“Don’t fucking tell me what to do.” They were climbing 50, 60mph.

“Spare me the retorts, kid. You’ve got it as much figured out as the rest of us. What, you’ve been out four months now, and you’re still jobless and living with-”

“You don’t know shit about my life-”

70mph.

“-And now I hear you’re with that girl who I’ve only met as a _child-_ ”

“-Don’t fucking bring her into this again-”

80mph.

“-I’m doing everything I can to make things right with your mother-”

“-You shouldn’t have _fucking left in the first place!”_

“BEN!”

The car lurched as Ben failed to cut the wheel in time, and the vehicle skid right off the road. He slammed on the breaks, dirt and branches spraying the windshield for one terrifying moment.

And then the front bumper collided with a tree.

 

\---

 

 

“Oh my God,” Rey gasped when she saw him. Her eyes instantly filled with tears, and Ben couldn’t blame her.

He looked like a monster.

A large jagged cut bisected the entire right side of his face and down his neck and chest, cutting through his skin hideously. It didn’t hurt so much anymore; he had been given medication as soon as he had gotten to the hospital. Now it was the harsh lighting of the room and the sickening feeling of not knowing that tore at him.

Rey buried her face in his uninjured shoulder, sobbing. “Thank God you’re okay,” she kept saying over and over again. He stiffly wrapped his arms around her.

There was a small cough, and the two turned towards the doorway. Ben’s eyes widened as he took in someone he hadn’t seen since before his sentence.

“Uncle,” he croaked, several emotions hammering in his brain and across his face at once.

Luke gave Ben a small smile, but his eyes were the most miserable Ben had ever seen them. And this was coming from the guy who swore on that silver lining bullshit.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Luke said softly.

“What are you doing here?”

Rey looked back and forth between the two men.

Luke’s face tensed. “I came as soon as I heard.” He rubbed a hand over his graying beard.

“About the accident?” Ben shook his head to clear it. Of course that’s what he meant. “Where’s Mom?”

Luke swallowed so slowly; it looked like the action caused him physical pain. “I don’t know how to tell you this, Ben.”

“Just say it,” he hissed, irritation and dread coursing through his veins.

His uncle stared right into him, with lost, deadened eyes.

“She’s saying goodbye to your father.”

 

\---

 

_Ben scarfed down his lunch and then grabbed the keys to his truck off the dining room table. He ran out to his truck, cursing when he discovered it was pouring._

_Technically he wasn’t Rey’s babysitter anymore, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t go and visit. She had been rather despondent the last time he had stopped by, which hadn’t been for long, given Plutt had made it very clear he wasn’t getting paid again, and had essentially told him to fuck off._

_Ben knew Rey was sad about leaving, and honestly, he was more upset at the prospect than he thought he would be. He had actually liked spending time with the kid every now and then._

_He stopped by the store to pick up some of her favorite candy, and then drove until he was at her condo. He parked his truck in the front as he always did, and then stepped out of his vehicle. By now the rain had stopped, and the sun was even starting to poke out through the clouds._

_Ben knocked on the door, hoping Rey would answer so he wouldn’t have to talk to Plutt. When it opened, however, there was a small, elderly woman on the other side._

_“Can I help you?” she asked, squinting up at him with massive spectacles._

_Ben blinked down at her. “Uh…who are you?”_

_“Name’s Maz. The real question is who are_ you? _”_

_He shook his head confused. “Do you know where Rey is?”_

_“Rey?” Maz’s eyes brightened in recognition. “Ah, you mean that youngling. She and her father moved out a few days ago.”_

_“No, that’s not right,” Ben said, “they aren’t supposed to leave until next week.”_

_“Sorry, boy. Her old man wanted them out as soon as possible. They must have left earlier than planned.”_

_Ben blinked, hurt and outrage crashing over his face. Maz squinted her eyes as she surveyed his reaction. She sighed._

_“I would give you their new address if I had it, but they didn’t leave a trace. I’m sorry. She must have been important to you.”_

_“It’s fine,” Ben heard himself say, his voice hollow. “She was just a stupid kid.”_

_He walked back to his truck and slipped inside, feeling strangely numb. Rey’s candy lay in a crumpled heap on the passenger seat._


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not to be dramatic, but I’m totally freaking out about potential theories/spoilers for episode IX. I 100% believe Ben will be redeemed, it just wouldn’t make sense for him not to be, but I am SO nervous he will die. I’ve heard theories about his sacrifice (who knows if that’s even true or how it will manifest), and half the people seem to think he will be resurrected, but then half think he will stay dead. Regardless I’ve also heard there will be some sort of profession of love to Rey, but I WANT HIM TO LIVE. But then I’m thinking well if it’s the end of the Skywalkers…would it make sense for JJ to kill him? I don’t like it, but that’s my thought process. 
> 
> Might be an unpopular opinion, but I would so much rather have him live and have implied Reylo then have him die and have confirmed Reylo. *sobs and then slinks quietly into darkness*

Ben didn’t remember much of the funeral. The right side of his face throbbed, and was only soothed by Rey continually squeezing his hand throughout the service. Leia didn’t shed any tears, but her eyes were the saddest Ben had ever seen them. He noticed she couldn’t quite look at him. Luke, however, couldn’t seem to _stop_ looking at him. His face was unreadable, and Ben wondered if he blamed him for Han’s death. God knows it wouldn’t seem far-fetched.

Poe and Finn offered their condolences, and although Ben’s eyes were dry, he noticed Poe’s were red-rimmed. He firmly believed his friend was holding back his own tears for his benefit, and although he didn’t need to, Ben was grateful anyway.

The only other person Ben recognized at the service was Chewie, but he didn’t say one word to him. He caught the towering man whispering something to Leia, and then she nodded and gave him a hug.

Ben looked away.

That night, he stayed with Rey, despite her protests that he should be with his mother. Ben had assured her that Leia would much rather not be around him right now; he believed that with all his soul.

When he sat on the futon in her apartment, he buried his face in his hands. He sat there for several minutes as Rey stood over him, and then with a small sigh, she tugged him to his feet.

She helped him as he moved robotically toward the bathroom. She turned on the knobs of the shower, sticking her hand under to make sure it was the right temperature.

“You should get in,” she told him, softly but firmly. She turned to leave.

“Stay,” he muttered, and she paused before nodding.

They undressed quietly, and when Ben stepped under the spray it burned his back, but he resisted the urge to turn it hotter. His arms folded around Rey, clutching her tightly as the water fell over them in rivulets. He made a small noise against her shoulder, and when the tears finally came, they blended with the rest of the water.

They lay in bed until it became dark, and then Ben moved over Rey to kiss her. She responded tentatively, clearly not sure if he was in the right state of mind for anything more intimate. He paused against her lips, distancing his face by half a foot, and running his thumb over her forehead.

“I’m not a good man, Rey,” he said quietly.

“Don’t say that,” she whispered.

He squeezed his eyes shut, so he could gather himself. “I’m not the person you knew back then. I haven’t been for a long time.”

Her eyes watched him carefully, and he was close enough to see the hazel in her iris burn with emotion.

“There’s something I have to tell you,” he said.

And so he did.

He told her of how things with his parents had deteriorated even more so after she had left. He told her how he had been given an opportunity by an employer, a mentor who he felt had truly believed in him.

Snoke.

The man had seen potential in Ben when he had beaten the shit out of two men, dead set on mugging him late one night. Snoke watched from the shadows, learning more about him and feeding him praise and promises, and he had made Ben feel special.

Ben would have done anything for Snoke. And he did. Hurt people who got in his way. Beat men within an inch of their lives. Abandoned them on the side of the road. He was told his actions were necessary, that they served a greater purpose. Ben was paid handsomely for every ‘warning’ he issued on Snoke’s behalf, but if he were being honest, having a true father figure was what made it worth it.

Eventually, things went to shit. There was a raid on Snoke’s hideout, and in the end Ben sold out his former master. He would have liked to think he did it because along the way he had been enlightened and had realized the error of his ways. It was hard to convince himself of that when it felt like he was just saving his own skin.

Six years. The judge said she was doing him a favor. Maybe she was. It certainly gave him time to think. He couldn’t look at either of his parents during the sentencing. How could he? All his life they had pressured him, tried to mold him into something he wasn’t, tried to push him away from what they feared most. He had only proven their fears right.

When he finished explaining, he studied Rey, trying to gauge her reaction.

His entire body stiffened when her hand came up to cup his face. “I know.”

He blanched. “You…you know?”

Rey suddenly became sheepish. “That night at the bar…the night we met again…Poe had his suspicions about us. He mentioned them to Finn and well…Finn’s never been good at keeping secrets. He wanted to make sure I knew.” She glanced off to the side. “I didn’t know the details but I…I knew enough.”

“Then why are you with me?” he asked, his voice coming out in a croak. “If you knew this whole time, why are you here with me now?”

“Because I know you,” she responded immediately. “I’ve always known you, Ben. You’ve made mistakes. I know you have, and so have you, but they don’t define you.” She shook her head sadly. “There’s so much good in you. I can just _feel_ it. I don’t understand why you don’t feel the same.”

Rey flinched as a droplet of water landed on her cheek, and Ben blinked in surprise; he hadn’t even realized he was crying. He brushed his thumb along her cheek, collecting the water.

“I love you,” he said, his voice alarmingly firm despite his fragile state.

In the darkness, he saw the faint film of water ring her eyes. “I love you too,” she whispered, “but I think you already knew that.”

He gave a tearful snort, and then leaned down to press a searing kiss to her mouth. She responded instantly, her hands tangling in his hair and tugging slightly.

He wasn’t gentle, and she didn’t expect him to be. When his mouth attached to her neck, he sucked in a way that would leave bruises, purple and glowing. Her nails dug into his shoulder as he tore at her clothing, and soon they were reduced to nothing but their underthings. He bit the place between her neck and shoulder, groaning when she bucked against him.

When he slid inside her, he had to grit his teeth to regain some semblance of control. He thrust into her wildly as she wove her legs around his hips, crying his name in breathy gasps. Her tongue tangled with his, and she tasted sweet.

“Say it again,” he begged her, as his movements became more frantic.

“I love you.”

He attacked her jawline, his body tensing.

“I love you, Ben,” she breathed.

He groaned lowly as he finally spilled into her, his rhythm becoming more desperate and sloppy all at once. When his shoulders slackened, he removed himself and slid down the mattress, his tongue easily finding her in the dark.

He loved it when she tugged at his hair. The way her toes curled around his biceps let him know she was close to the edge. He ran his tongue down her slit before coming up to circle her most sensitive place. He could feel his cock becoming hard again as she moaned his name.

Soon she was coming on his tongue, and Ben dug his fingers into her thighs as she rode out her climax. Her body shuddered deliciously, and Ben regretted not slipping a finger inside her to feel her convulsions for himself.

She let out a sigh as she came down, and he crawled up her body to deposit an open mouthed kiss.

She made a face. “It tastes strange.”

“It tastes fucking wonderful,” he corrected her.

“Maybe to you,” she murmured, nuzzling his neck.

They lay in each other’s arms for a long time afterwards, so long that Ben assumed Rey had fallen asleep long ago. That was why when she spoke again, he practically jumped.

“Don’t be cross with me, but I think you should talk to your mother and uncle.”

He exhaled through his nostrils. “Rey-”

“They love you, Ben. Just as much as I do. You _must_ believe that.”

He ran his fingers down her bare side. “Have you seen the way they look at me? They despise me. Both of them. Especially after…especially now.”

Rey sat up. “You only see what you want to see, Ben Solo. If you just open those stupid, fucking eyes of yours for _once,_ you might see what’s really there.”

Ben’s mouth dropped. “…You…I’ve never heard you swear before.”

“I’ll do it again if I must.” Rey glared at him in the darkness.

He paused, and then dragged his hand up her back, tugging her back down to him. “I don’t believe you,” he murmured, referring to her earlier statement, “but I’ll…I’ll do as you suggest. If it makes you happy.”

He could practically feel her smug smile forming against his chest.

 

\---

 

Early the next morning, while Rey was still fast asleep, Ben slunk out of the bed and meandered over to his packed bag. He withdrew some of the art supplies he had borrowed from work, and made his way into the bathroom.

It wasn’t the ideal painting spot, but Rey had a studio apartment, so there weren’t many other options. He laid out a piece of paper, serving as his canvas, and then he cracked open the first tube of paint. His nose crinkled as the familiar chemical scent reached his nostrils.

He set out a paper towel, poured the colors onto his makeshift palette, and then began to paint.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoy Reylo AU, feel free to check out my story “Unknown Number,” if you haven’t already. It’s um…quite a bit naughtier than this one. 
> 
> Also Happy Mother’s Day to all those mothers out there!

Ben straightened his bow tie, brushing his bangs back from his forehead. Tuxedos weren’t his thing, but he supposed it was necessary, given he was the best man.

Rey was going to meet him at the chapel, for Rose was giving her and some of the other guests a ride. Ben, whose car had been hopelessly totaled, would have to ride with his mother.

He stepped out into the hallway, just as he saw the tail of Leia’s dress disappear around the corner. He clenched and unclenched his fists, more out of anxiety than anything else.

“Are you ready?” he called into the empty hallway, his voice sounding strange and forced.

Leia appeared then, her graying hair lifted into an elaborate bun. Her dress was a midnight blue, topped with a shimmering silver cardigan. Her eyes met his properly for the first time since Han’s death. She gave him a small nod.

The pair walked to the car, and Ben slid into the passenger seat. Leia stood outside his door.

“What are you doing?” she asked neutrally.

Ben blinked. “Wouldn’t you…prefer to drive?”

Leia gestured to her decorative dress. “In this?”

Ben swallowed. “I just thought…you wouldn’t want me to drive.” His voice trickled out weakly at the end, and he was mortified when he discovered how close to crying he was.

Leia’s mouth set in a hard line, but her eyes were gentle. “Don’t be absurd, Ben. I’m not afraid of my own son.”

He stared at her then, _really_ stared at her. Her face was practically a mask, a technique he had tried to learn growing up, but had failed miserably at. Even so, he could detect misery, disappointment, anxiety, but also…a softness.

He was reminded of his promise to Rey.

“Alright,” he said stiffly, getting out of the car and helping his mother into the passenger seat. He walked around to the other side, and after hesitating for one long moment; he slid the key into the ignition.

Unfortunately, it was during the drive when Ben lost his nerve. He had been so set to speak to his mother, so ready to talk with her the way Rey had suggested…but he was scared. He knew Leia wouldn’t be the first to bring up the topic; she probably suspected he would just lash out. He couldn’t blame her for feeling this way. If he wanted to try and salvage what remained of their relationship, he would have to make the first step.

But not right now.

Ben cleared his throat a million times during the journey to the venue, but he never spoke once.

 

\---

 

“Ben! It’s great to see you!” Rose flung her arms around him, and Ben jolted at the contact. He heard a familiar burst of laughter a little ways away, and he turned to find Rey, her hand covering her mouth.

He supposed the scene must have looked ridiculous, given he was more than a foot taller than Rose.

When the smaller woman finally released him, Rey came up to kiss him in greeting. She looked ravishing in a sleeveless, emerald gown, her hair twisted up in a style that he knew she was only wearing for the sake of the wedding.

“You are beautiful,” he told her, and her cheeks reddened pleasantly.

“So are you,” she replied, a grin spreading across her face.

Eventually everyone took his or her seats on the pews. Ben and Rey stood off to the side, so they could complete their wedding duties as was appropriate. Poe already stood at the altar, and Ben noticed this was the first time he had seen his friend genuinely looking nervous. He hid it well, he was Poe Dameron after all, but he couldn’t fool Ben.

His eyes scanned the rows of pews, and they landed on his mother, and then, to his utter shock, he found Luke sitting beside her. He hadn’t even been aware Leia was bringing a plus one. As the music began to play and the chapel doors opened, Luke’s eyes briefly met his, and Ben hurriedly looked away, completely unnerved.

When Finn entered, Rey had already crossed down to the front end of the room, hooking her arm into his. As the two proceeded to walk down the aisle, Ben observed the contrast of Finn’s white suit to Poe’s black one. Once Rey and Finn had completed their journey, Rey broke off from Finn, giving him a quick kiss before she took her place next to Ben.

The ceremony was nice; even Ben could appreciate that. When it came time to give them the rings, Ben handed them over with slightly shaky hands. Jumbles of emotions beat throughout his chest, and he was having a hard time identifying which one he felt the most strongly.

As the ceremony concluded, Finn and Poe shared a kiss as husband and husband, and everyone went nuts. Ben glanced at Rey to find her eyes were watery, but she did her best to tamper down any escaping tears. Her eyes never broke away from the couple, and Ben’s never broke away from her.

She had never been more beautiful.

During the reception, after they had made the rounds and congratulated Finn and Poe, Ben took Rey out onto one of the balconies. The venue was attached to a golf course with a rolling landscape that seemingly stretched for miles.

Ben wiped a sweaty strand from his forehead. This tuxedo would be the death of him.

“It’s lovely,” Rey said, referring to the view.

Ben nodded, his hand coming inside his pant pocket. He brushed the folded up paper, praying it hadn’t gotten too crinkled.

“Why did you bring us out here?”

“I wanted to give you something,” he confessed, withdrawing the paper. “Don’t get too excited. It’s just something to give you luck for your driving test.”

Rey stared at him curiously as she took the paper and unfolded it slowly. When it was completely lain out, she studied it silently. Several seconds passed and Ben was starting to become concerned, but then she gripped the paper to her chest and closed her eyes.

“Uh,” he was at a complete loss, “are you okay?”

She shook her head. “No.”

Now he _was_ concerned. “Rey, what is it?”

She opened her eyes and stared down at the painting again. “I can’t believe you did this.”

Ben’s ears reddened as he scratched the back of his neck. “It’s really not that good-”

“Ben Solo, don’t you dare try to do that!” She pointed a finger at him. “This is…this is brilliant.” She angled the painting so they could both look at it.

It had taken him two hours, he remembered. His supplies had been limited, but he had thankfully had the colors he needed, making sure to keep the paints off of her bathroom floor.

He had drawn her, of course. She was unmistakable with the curly, brown strokes of her hair, twisted into her signature three buns. Her arms were long and tanned as they gripped the controls of a Boeing 777, the sky a brilliant mixture of pink and blue.

“I’m a pilot,” she whispered, the tip of her finger tracing over a grey wing.

He pressed a kiss to her temple. “I know.”

 

\---

 

When they finally emerged from the balcony, Finn and Poe were beginning their first dance. Rey bid Ben a quick adieu, so she could go use the restroom.

“Trust me, it’s going to be more of a process than you would think,” she had said, gesturing to her dress.

When she departed, Ben found a place to watch the happy couple, his hands in his pockets. He stiffened as he felt a hand, too large to be Rey’s, grip his shoulder. He turned and met the piercing blue eyes of his uncle.

“It’s good to see you,” Luke told him, removing his hand.

“Is it?” Ben replied dully.

Luke gave him a pained smile. “It is, if you can believe it.”

Ben remained silent.

Luke’s mouth quirked up at one side. He nodded in the direction of the restrooms. “She’s someone special to you, isn’t she?”

Ben could have retorted that it was none of his business, but he didn’t have it in him. “Yes,” he replied honestly.

Luke nodded. “Good. She’ll give you balance.”

Ben wasn’t exactly sure what he meant by that. He opened his mouth to inquire, but his uncle’s hand was back on his shoulder, squeezing tightly.

“I know now’s not the time to go into details but…you always have someone to help you, Ben.” Luke’s mouth tightened. “I’m not sure I ever made that clear to you.”

Ben nodded dumbly. He couldn’t even fathom what to say, but luckily he didn’t need to say anything. Luke took a step back as his eyes went to someone behind Ben’s shoulder. A moment later, Rey popped up next to him, and a look crossed her face, as if she wasn’t sure if she had just interrupted something.

Luke smiled. “I’ll see you two around.” He nodded to Rey and then disappeared back into the ground.

Rey gave Ben a curious look, but he just shook his head. “I’ll explain later.”

They both glanced up as the music changed, signaling the end of Finn and Poe’s first dance. More couples gravitated to the dance floor, and Rey smiled at Ben.

Ben cleared his throat, his own small smile appearing on his face. “Uh, would you…want to dance?”

Rey opened her mouth to speak, but then her eyes shifted and a thoughtful expression crossed her face. “Yes,” she answered, “but I think there’s someone who would like to dance more.”

Ben followed her gaze and discovered his mother standing by the edge of the dance floor, watching the other couples. He felt a strange emotion beating throughout his chest as he watched her with her hands folded, her eyes wistful.

Rey squeezed his hand. “I’ll wait,” she murmured.

Ben looked at his girlfriend, at her soft smile, at her knowing eyes, and he kissed her gently. Then, he turned away and wandered over to his mother.

Leia glanced up as he approached, mild curiosity on her face. “Ben-”

“Would you like to dance?” he asked, anxiety making his voice come out rather cold. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I mean, would you please dance with me?”

Leia’s face flinched, and then finally the mask broke. He could clearly see the heartbreak written all over her face, but underneath it all he saw something else.

Happiness.

Ben couldn’t remember the last time she had looked at him and been happy.

“Of course,” she told him, taking his outstretched hand.

As they swayed on the dance floor, they didn’t speak. Now wasn’t the time to talk, Ben knew, but somehow this silence was different from that in the car. This silence gave them a promise, that despite it all, they would both try harder from now on.

As Leia’s head rested again her son’s shoulder, Ben met Rey’s eyes across the dance floor. She was clutching his drawing.

‘I love you,’ she mouthed.

He smiled back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a sweet little ending! I kind of like the ‘openish’ ending style for this, especially since I really wanted to end on a sweet note between Ben and the women in his life. I hope you enjoyed my story, and thank you so much to all my readers and commenters, and those of you who left kudos! Here’s a summary of that fun, smutty, fic I mentioned earlier. I will begin posting in a few weeks, after I finish "Unknown Number."
> 
> “Space Virgins”
> 
> During the day, Kylo can’t break through the Bond. Rey is too angry and too hurt to hear him out, let alone touch him again. 
> 
> When he finds he can intercept her while she’s sleeping, however, he discovers in their dreams he is more confident and she’s more willing.
> 
> Uncle Luke is NOT amused. 
> 
> Or:
> 
> A million and one ways Luke tries to cock block his nephew


End file.
